View this post on Instagram

A post shared by CIEE Merida (@ciee_merida)

Now that Chooch has a “squad” in Mexico, we’re getting less and less updates from him and that’s FINE, let the boy live his life, etc etc. But damn yo it’s excruciating being a mom over here waiting to be fed, yanno?

He sends us the dumbest pictures too and then doesn’t even tell us what they are so basically we’re at the mercy of the CIEE Yucatán insta. Let’s see what they shared during week 2:

Except for this! Chooch sent it to me because he went ice skating and had to exchange his skates multiple times and then got a BIG BLISTER. This was right after he went to the beach and got a BIG SUNBURN.

On Monday of Week 2, they made pinatas!

I was definitely a little jealous because my Monday just consisted of screaming into the void, which is also known as Monday thru Friday.

Then one day, they went to a museum to look at ART and I did not know this until CIEE posted pictures.

Last weekend, they had an overnight trip to Vallodolid, where they went to the 7th wonder of the world, Chichen Itza, saw spider monkeys which he didn’t tell me about until I ASKED, and swam in a cenote. They ziplined too!

You guys, this is apparently his squad! Why was I worried about him going on this solo trip and being miserable? He always makes friends so fast!

I *am* annoyed that he was one of the few that didn’t have on the CIEE shirt. I’m sure he wasn’t paying attention and missed the memo, which is very on brand.

I think this is his Level 2 group. I’m pretty impressed that he’s only taken one high school year of Spanish and managed to place himself into the middle of three levels!

I was laughing though because he told Janna before he left that he didn’t know any Spanish and she seemed concerned about this. I was like, “He’s probably trolling you, Janna” and she was like, “You’re probably right.” I mean, whose son is he?!

It’s so weird, but over the weekend I was going through some boxes of photos that I brought home from my grandparent’s house in 2016 and there was a stack of photos from when my Aunt Sharon visited the Yucatan in the 90s. Then, the same day, I was watching one of my favorite YouTubers and she was showing some stuff from her closet that she was donating to ThreadUp She held up a dress and said, “Here’s the dress I wore recently when I visited Chichen Itza” and then a picture of her from there popped up in the corner and I was like, “Wow. That’s a sign of something, I guess.”

Chooch’s squad again!

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Erin Appledale (@ohhonestlyerin)

He’s only got one and a half more weeks to go and I have a feeling he’s going to be Mr. Miz when he comes home. I always fell into a deep depression/mourning as a kid when I would come home from big trips. Henry was like, “You still do though??” and then I remembered the Post-Korea Depression and laughed sadly. Yes, I still do.

Anyway, I’m excited to find out tomorrow on the weekly CIEE blog post what Chooch has been up to this week because as usual, no info. Which is fine, you know, live your life, bro. Be in the moment, etc etc!

Henry mentioned that Kennywood was giving away free ice cream last week to pass holders and I was like, “I’m down for some free ice cream” so we went to  Kennywood after work on Thursday. Of course, it was a day that I actually went into the office, so by the time I came home and changed, it was after 6:30 when we got to Kennywood and because amusement parks have lame hours now, the park was set to close at 8. Boo hiss.

But the one good thing about getting there so late is that hordes of people were exiting when we were walking in, so even STEEL CURTAIN, that cursed coaster, only had a 15 minute wait. AND there was a nun AND a priest in line, AND it was running two train ops! MIRACLE?? Maybe.

THERE THEY ARE!! ^^^

Anyway, Steel Curtain is pretty great. My opinion fluctuates a lot because I want it to be a little bit better than it is and also maybe not so rattle-y considering how new it is. But I do like it overall! It just doesn’t have that WOW factor, and I mean, it really should because it still currently holds the record for the most inversions on a coaster in North America but you don’t really get off the thing feeling you just rode a record-holder, you know?

And in our case on this evening, you don’t get off the coaster until after maintenance fucks around and keeps your train parked out on the brake run in a knucklefucking downpour.

I mean, it was some heavy rain, people, and we were totally exposed, like sitting ducks. And the wind was kicking up all around us too so I was terrified that we were going to slammed with airborne projectiles. YOU NEVER KNOW. Don’t fuck with weather! Some broad died at Kennywood years ago when a microburst blew through!

Yeah, so were pretty fucking angry about this. I don’t know what was going on but as soon as we hit the brake run, one of the JOCKOS as Henry would say made an announcement that “SOMETHING SOMETHING BLAH BLAH 20 MINUTES” so the empty train in the station just sat there and ours couldn’t pull in. Thank god whatever was happening didn’t take the full 20 minutes and we eventually got to get off the damn thing after about 5 minutes, at which point the ride operator (who is ALWAYS there), chirped a quick and totally insincere “sorry” into the mic and I honestly wanted to kick him.

2 for 2 getting stuck in a rain storm at an amusement park that week! I was having a really great hair day too oh well.

“Do you think God was pissed that his people were riding coasters on his time so he made the sky open?” I hypothesized giddily.

“Well, no, because they were on the train in front of us and didn’t get stuck like we did!” Henry rationalized.

“Henry, even GOD fucks up, everyone knows that!” I mean, he allowed DONALD TRUMP to happen, didn’t he?

Steel Curtain: Not a Bad Ride.

The rain didn’t last for very long so we were able to ICE CREAM AND CARRY ON.

Um, hello, Henry failed to mention that it was only free to the first however-many passholders! So we had to pay. I would have opted to just go to Golden Nugget but it was already closed, and honestly this was still just as satisfying. I haven’t had true soft serve at Kennywood in a hot min.

After ice cream, we got in a ride on our beloved Phantom’s Revenge (walk-on!), attempted to ride Swingshot with five minutes left before the lines closed at 8pm but it started pouring down rain again as soon as we sat down and they were like “We can’t run the ride in this but you’re welcome to stay on the ride.”

….?

Why would we want to sit on a non-running ride while sheets of water poured down on us? N-n-n-no thanks. Of course, a few minutes later, the rain ended.

Honestly, Steel Curtain, soft serve, and Phantom’s Revenge in less than 90 minutes wasn’t the worst way to end a random Thursday evening in July.

And now, I’ll leave you with this apropos dulcet tune by Yangyang, Kun, and Taeil of NCT. <3

The month was June, and these books were read.

1. The Family Chao – Lan Samantha Chang

Leftover from Asian Readathon. Three stars. I only cared about the dog.

2. The Last Mrs. Parrish – Liv Constantine

Solid domestic thriller! I love it when a book blindsides me and this one definitely did.

3. Once Upon a K-Prom – Kat Cho

Nothing ground-breaking here, just a cute YA centered around Kpop – it was just the light, fluffy read that I needed, like a palate cleanser before moving onto meatier books. My favorite part about this is that each member of the Kpop group had their own page of member facts and it would list who their idols were growing up (G-Dragon was mentioned for one!) and who their friends are (NCT and Stray Kids came up a lot for this!). I loved also that BTS was not mentioned AT ALL but I did kind of feel like the fictional Kpop group was based off of them, except that one of the members was American which is not the case with BTS. I always appreciate when other Kpop groups are name-dropped because BTS is such an obvious, lazy, boring choice.

4. Yerba Buena – Nina LaCour

OK. Nina LaCour is like, the little fucking darling of Booktube, right?

But I tried one of her other books and hated it so much. When I got this book from the library, I didn’t even realize it was hers. However, I believe this is her first foray into adult contemporary (she typically writes YA but it’s the super pretentious, navel-gazey kind that makes me roll my eyes). Um, ha. Whoa there. Consider my opinion changed BIGLY. This book was so beautiful, the characters were emotional in a way that they felt 100% real to me. I just wanted the best for everyone and I couldn’t wait to see how the two narratives were going to collide. The most sublime and believable Sapphic love story I’ve read in quite a while. I’m crying just thinking about it.

5. The Last Final Girl – Stephen Graham Jones

When am I going to quit trying to love this fucking guy? Horror movies are my absolute fave so the references were not lost on me, but this book just wasn’t it. Written like a movie script, I get what it was trying to do but it was confusing and hard to follow. So fucking cheesy.

6. Greenwich Park – Katherine Faulkner

Really twisty domestic thriller – kept me hooked and entertained on my daily walks!

I think I’m starting to prefer British thrillers over American at this point. Far less duds!

7. A Deadly Inside Scoop – Abby Collette

I apparently gave this book a four, but my knee-jerk reaction to seeing this cover was that I only moderately enjoyed it. Lots of over-the-top characters and suspects which I anticipated going into this but the thing that most bothered me was how many times people were like, “YOUR ICE CREAM SHOP IS OPEN IN THE WINTER?” Um, people eat ice cream all the fucking time, no matter what season, and also in the book I’m pretty sure it was only October?? I couldn’t get past that. It was so strange. Aside from that, it was cute. I don’t think I’ll be continuing the series though. I think what I’m learning about myself if that I prefer sinister, dark mysteries over the cute and cozy lot.

8. Version Zero – David Yoon

I hated this book so bad that I don’t even want to review it.

But I will say that where I changed my negative opinion of Nina LaCour after reading her first foray into adult novels, my positive opinion of David Yoon based on his two exceptional YA books was tarnished a bit for me after reading his first adult novel. A caveat: I should have steered clear from the get-go because I do not like sci-fi / techy books and that’s exactly what this was. Also, the characters were very poorly written and I was stunned because typically David excels at character development. This just made me feel so uncomfy and bored.

9. Delilah Green Doesn’t Care – Ashley Herring Blake

This romance was fucking presh. I loved the small town vibes, strained family dynamics, chaotic wedding planning, snappy dialogue. I WILL be continuing this series!

10. All the Wrong Places – Joy Fielding

OK Joy, I see you, and I’m sorry that I never heard of you until last month when I snatched this book from a nearby Little Free Library. What a sick, fast-paced thriller about a serial killer who snags his victims from online dating sites. Seems like a tired concept, sure, but this one is very much focused on the relationships and lives of four women so you’re just waiting for the other shoe to drop the whole  time. I was pleasantly surprised with this one!

***

You have now finished reading WHAT I READ IN JUNE. Please enjoy the rest of your day.

1. Plant Stuff

I blinked and my cactus in the Cure Corner sprouted two tall growths.

2. The only way I can get Chooch to respond to me is to send him pictures of the cats.

3. Coney Island Peep Show

I got stuck talking to Hot Naybor Chris yesterday morning after he busted me negotiating in the backyard with one of the Mr. Gray Guy squirrels (I am so close to earning their trust, I can feel it), and he said, “You know, not everyone can say that they can look out their kitchen window and see Coney Island. I gotta come over sometime and see the whole set up.” This is weird because we’ve lived next door to each other for 20 years (!!) and he has not once been inside our house. SHOULD I CHARGE AN ADMISSION FEE?

ALSO OH GOD WHAT ELSE DOES HE SEE DO I NEED TO UP MY CURTAIN GAME.

4. Rad new kitchen addition!

Megan gave me some early birthday presents at work on Thursday (we were in the office for CASUAL LUNCH) and this sparkling cassette thing is the perfect vessel for my coffee cart straws! (NOT PLASTIC STRAWS, FYI – these are biodegradable.)

5. Ridic TBR

This is my current TBR stack – two of them are currently being read, but I am drowning! So many of my library requests came in at once and I am trying to stay calm about it, lol ugh.

6. Downtown Jesus

Speaking of CASUAL LUNCH, when I was coming down from the designated lunch room with Nate and Amber, we saw Downtown Jesus in the lobby of our building! Nate gave me a knowing glance and it almost felt like the old days.

It’s effing humid in my house. The end.

Hi it’s me, the one who can’t stop typing words about amusement parks but so sorry that it’s prime park time and I’m trying to get in as much as I can because YOLO if YOLO is still cool which it is not but either am I which means I can still use it.

Anyway, I already told you that Henry and I went to Waldameer in Erie for a few hours on Sunday. It was…actually fantastic. We’ve been there numerous times but never JUST THE TWO US so it was like a date which is what everything has felt like lately and it’s weird and cool but also sad because it’s basically a taste of what life will be like once we’re empty nesters and I don’t want to be an empty nester because that will mean I’m OLD?!

I mean, because that will mean that my BABYKINS, MOMMY’S BEST BOY, etc etc will be in college, and then eventually, out of college…and OK Erin. Stop. Stop it.

Back to Waldameer.

There are several great reasons to go to Waldameer:

1. it’s right on Lake Erie
2. it’s free admission so if you’re not into rides but want to chow down on some fair food and people watch, you can march your ass right on in through those gates with authority
3. RAVINE FLYER II is one of the best woodies in PA.
4. WHACKY SHACK.
5. parking is free
6. they have SIMPLY DIVINE cookies
7. it’s just a really cute little park with something for everyone, ok?

We go mostly for Ravine Flyer II and Whacky Shack, but you do you.

Here are pictures of the Ravine Flyer II as taken from the tRaIn:

I lied – this last one was taken from the fErRiS wHeEl.

(You guys it’s 100 degrees in my house and it’s making me be weird.)

Carousel mirror selfie!

I just realized that somehow, we didn’t fight at all. Not even when it was carouselfie time.

When we were riding the dumb train, it started storming, like with thunder and lightning so A REAL STORM and we were sitting in the front seat of one of the cars so even though there was a roof, there was actually very little protection. We were soaking wet by the time we got off it and ended up just chilling in the station afterward, waiting it out and watching a family of skunks terrorize a group trying to have a picnic at a nearby pavilion. It was exciting! Skunks are cute! SHOULD I MOVE ON TO SKUNK WHISPERING AFTER I CONQUER THE MR. GRAY GUY SQUIRRELS??

The Scrambler was actually still operating in the storm which I thought was questionable.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Erin Appledale (@ohhonestlyerin)

I’ve only ever eaten pizza at Waldameer and it’s pretty good! I could have easily BEASTED a second slice, to be honest though.

“I just took a picture of that guy taking a picture,” I wheezed to Henry, delirious with giddy self-satisfaction.

“Cool..?” he said, going back to ignoring me on the train.

It did eventually stop raining though and we got to enjoy rides again. We were the only people on the ferris wheel!!

I did start to rain again though when we went on the Tilt-a-Whirl but this ended up being the best experience I might have ever had on this dumb ride? Henry was super into it suddenly and had it spinning really hard and I was laughing so hard that my laughs kept catching in my throat. I was so fucking giddy on this day! If you had told me like, 15 years ago that Henry and I would still be together in the year 2022 and having so much fun that my face would feel like it was going to split open, I’d think you were a horrible fucking liar. I used to call him Hoover because he sucked the fun out of everything, for Christ’s sake! And now I prefer to spend all my time with him because we’re always doing fun shit?!

Life is wild.

There’s always country music playing in this side of the park but country music is ONLY tolerable in these kinds of settings so I didn’t hate it too much.

LOLOLOL.

I’ve only ridden this once, probably the first time we were there when Chooch was like 5 or 6 and I forgot that it’s actually a pretty cute/fun log flume! There’s a tunnel with storm effects! We got really wet all over again!

I love that there’s a huge ass tree that the Comet station and track was built around. Also, Comet was running pretty smoothly! This is a great little family woodie.

Literally one of my favorite dark rides ever.

I think that’s basically it. We left around 4:30, went to Hank’s in Meadville for some custard and there were two large groups of super annoying people in front of us that I really hated, and the flavors of the day weren’t anything special (strawberry, chocolate, and vanilla) and I immediately regretted getting a cone once I heard Henry order an apple pie sundae, but it was whatever.

Overall, a really nice day with my dumb Henry.

I suggested that we take a little day trip to Waldameer Park on Sunday because why should Chooch get to have all the fun, amirite. Ravine Flyer II got some retracking done recently and I wanted to try it out for myself.

It takes about 2 hours to get to Erie, and we spent most of the time listening to a Megan Miranda audiobook that I ended up finishing on my own a few days later and do not recommend. I think it was called The Perfect Stranger. Who cares?

Anyway, we had a really nice time at Waldameer and I will get into the nitty gritty at a later date but not right now because it’s hot AF and I want to go to bed soon so instead let’s look at an array of Henry’s dumb faces at Waldameer.

Standing in line for Steel Tiger.

Standing in line for Steel Tiger: Portrait Mode.

Standing in line for Comet.

CAROUSELFIES aren’t the same without Chooch :(

Getting ready to wash down that pizza with a soft pretzel.

Henry, trying not to fall asleep on the train.

Henry, thinking about the impending 2 hour drive home.

Standing in line for Tilt-a-Whirl after waiting out a thunderstorm (evidence: my hair).

The “I Haven’t Ridden a Tilt-a-Whirl since 1987” face of impending regret.

That’s all for this sweltering Wednesday evening. I have nothing else to give, so sorry.

Saturday was a pretty chill day. For alibi purposes, here is what went down:

I spent a million hours at the salon getting babylights. I went to a new-to-me place called Bad Apple because my friend goes there and posted about it on Insta and I was like, “That place sounds nice and the name matches my tattoo” so I made an appt because the last place I went was only out of convenience and being panicked about going back to work after two years of WFH’ing and I needed something done FAST.

I liked it but they only did partial highlights without me even realizing what was going on and the gray coverage was NOT good – the whole front of my head was like a billboard for gray hair recognition! And the broad who did my hair was not really my style. She was more like, Big Hat at Coachella vibes and I wasn’t comfortable with that.

I’m picky. We all should be when it comes to our hair!

Anyway, I really liked Bad Apple a lot and the girl who did my hair (Carly) was SO CHILL and easy to talk to. Definitely my type of person. My hair isn’t like, IN YOUR FACE, different since I only just recently had highlights done, but she did a full highlight and blended and toned it SO WELL. I didn’t even need a cut and she was gushing about how healthy my hair is and that like, never happens, so I am crediting that to Vegamour (which I was going to cancel but now I’m like SHOULD I??) and Jennifer Aniston’s Lolavie product line.

After spending nearly all day in The Chair (9:30 – 2ish ugh this is why I’m like the ONLY GIRL in the world who does not enjoy going to the salon. Sitting still is not in my wheelhouse), I came home and scarfed down a quick salad and then Henry and I went to Allegheny Cemetery so I could walkwalkwalkwalkwalkwalkwalk.

We took this to send to our AWOL son.

Shortly after, I saw a fun photo op and asked, tentatively, for Henry to help me achieve said shot. Of course, he blundered it bigly, resulting in A Fight because honestly his lack of even the basic, most RUDIMENTARY photo skills drives me nuts. So then he had the audacity to get mad at me for getting mad at him and I was like YOU KNOW WHAT, JUST LEAVE AND PICK ME UP LATER and then I performed a perfectly-timed storm-off down a brick path while he stayed on the road.

I made sure I waited a long time before tossing a furtive glance over my shoulder to see if he was following me.

HE WAS NOT.

Which equal parts pleased and angered me.

THIS IS CHOOCH’S NEVER SHOUT NEVER SHIRT :(

Well I was off on my own, I paused to take some pictures of my new Korean Vans <3. I’d like to point out that they were shipped from South Korea on a Sunday, and I had them on my feet by the following Wednesday.

South Korea does NOT fuck around with shipping. When you hear expats saying that South Korea has THE BEST delivery service, believe.

Meanwhile, Henry was commenting whiny things on my Instagram for all to see and I was like OMFG this man is so desperate so I made my way back to the car and then he had to play his little hiding game with me which is so annoying. I should have just left him there – I had my car key on me….

…but not my house key. Dammit, I’m always missing something!

I felt bad for Henry because he clearly cannot survive without me so I accepted his groveling apology but only because I wanted to go to the Grant in Millville because it’s been years since we had a slice of the best coconut cream pie in at least the whole state if not the UNIVERSE.

We got there right when they opened at 4, us and all the Olds! We were relegated to the BACK ROOM which isn’t as woodsy and Bavarian-esque as the main dining room so I was pissed. I guess we weren’t OF AGE enough. (Henry probably was but then I lowered the average.)

I like this picture up there though because Henry sort of looks like he’s smiling at me. Smrobly a fluke though.

We decided to get dinner while we were there too even though we weren’t really hungry but it’s a good thing that we did because our food took a really long time to come out – I didn’t mind so much because we didn’t have any where we needed to be and this was basically just helping us build up an appetite, but our waitress was so stressed about this delay and she kept reporting back to us and making sure we were properly hydrated. I fucking LOVED her. Honestly, we didn’t care about the wait at all because we were super engrossed in receiving updates from Chooch (this was when he was suffering through the off-the-cuff vegetarian burrito made from pineapples and cactus, lol) and we were obsessed with the ongoing plight of the young host/busboy who kept trying to sit down and take a break in the corner only to immediately be summoned. My favorite part was when he tried to seat people in our dumb room and one of the waitresses came back to say, “They want to sit in the front room.” He went back to retrieve the menus from the table and as he walked past us to go back to the front room, I heard him huff under his breath, “of course they do.” It was fantastic.

Anyway, our waitress ended up comping us one of the slices of coconut cream and I was like, “This was not necessary – Henry leave her a giant tip” but when she came back with the check, she wisely gave it to me which was good because Henry is a shitty tipper.

Oh man, we ended up so stuffed from eating a dinner that we weren’t really hungry for but that pie man. THAT PIE. It is a religious experience. I am a FIRM believer in the Book of Whipped Topping Coco-Cream. Meringue is for pariahs.

Waiting for Henry to pee on the way out. This is the room I wanted to sit in. :(

HENRY, POST-PEE.

Well, those were the highlights of the day. We came home and spent most of the evening rearranging Chooch’s room. We really want to have that fucking attic cleaned out and painted before he comes back so it can be an extension of his room (like the lounge area) but I don’t think that’s happenin’ hot stuff.

I’m sure you guys are shocked that my 16-year-old son is barely throwing me the tiniest of crumbs when I ask him mommy-centric questions like, oh I don’t know, HOW IS IT GOING IN MEXICO?

ARE YOU HAVING A NICE TIME?

WHAT ARE YOU EATING?

IS YOUR HOST FAMILY NICE?

DO YOU MISS ME?

WHAT DID YOU DO TODAY?

I get one-word answers mostly. Well, it was REALLY dicey the first two days because his phone wasn’t working even though Mexico is included in his plan (I guess it took a few days to figure out what was up??) so he had to use Whatsapp to talk to us and I guess he didn’t like that so we barely heard from him and I thought for sure that he was having a shitty time and kept crying to Henry, “DID WE MAKE A MISTAKE???? THIS WAS ALL YOUR IDEA!!!”

I had to rely on the CIEE Yucatan Insta for pictures and updates.

THIS ONE REALLY WORRIED ME because he looks really tense?! This is unlike him!!!! Corey texted me and was like, “Um….

???” and I was like, “Right?!”

But then he sent us pictures of the dogs at his host family’s house!

And this pretty church thing!

And a series of barrio pets!

He sent all those to Henry and when I asked for a picture, he was like:

Once he got his texting ability back, he was like rapid-fire texting me with info and I was like, “OMFG THIS IS GREAT.” Yes, is enjoying his time there! Yes, he likes his host family! He is staying there with another kid, Julian, who is from Seattle and Chooch said he’s nice and they get along well. He just told me right now that they were playing soccer in the park last night at 8pm with a bunch of 9-year-olds lol.

I think he really likes that they get to hang out in the city center at night – I think their curfew is like 10:00 or something so they’re not out gallivanting until dawn or anything. And we all know that Chooch LOVES public transportation (no sarcasm) so he’s living his best life I’m quite sure.

I don’t know what any of this stuff is, he just sends it to me and then dips.

This was Wednesday I think and you can see that he’s smiling! I was 100% relieved by this point and am no longer worried. Yes, I miss him tons but my secondhand excitement is greater!

I think they kid next to him is his roommate.

This is his group’s sign thing, I dunno. He doesn’t tell me!

Other intel I’ve gotten from him is that there are 7 vegetarians including him but the rest are all girls and he doesn’t talk to them. OK cool. But it sounds like he doesn’t have an issue with getting veg meals, except for Saturday when he was at a restaurant and asked for a burrito with no meat and was given a burrito with cactus and pineapple and nothing else and said it was rancid and that he tricked into ordering it (??). And his host family went to the beach on Sunday but all I know is that his back got sunburnt really bad because, even though I sent him there with sunblock, he is a moron when it comes to applying it so I’m sure his back has lots of fun handprints all over it because that’s his signature sunburn style.

I’m telling you, if he was a girl, I’d have a deluge of photos and you’d probably have read about 4 guest blogs by now. Chooch is the worst! He is so much like Henry in that regard. I’m over here like YOU HAVE TO WRITE EVERYTHING DOWN. TAKE A MILLION PICTURES!!! SEND POSTCARDS!!! and he’s like, “here’s a picture of my Starbucks that looks like it could have been taken down the street from our house.”

(This is the Insta he created specifically for this trip because god forbid he should post stuff to his actual account that he hasn’t used since like 2020, IDFK.)

We’ll see how much intel I’m able to collect over the next week!

I am shook. My heart has been empty without G Dragon and he has delivered. This is so unexpected and exceeds every expectation I had when I found out about this collab. I am in (happy) tears right now as we’re driving to Waldameer Park – thank you, GD!

I just fell in love with him all over again. My king.

100% the main reason we wanted to go to Michigan’s Adventure was to stuff our butts onto Shivering Timbers, the Custom Coasters, Inc. (CCI for all you woodie simps out there) monstrosity that sits at the top of every thoosie’s wooden coaster Top 10 list.

Literally the best coaster (if not ride in general) in the park and it was practically a walk-on all damn day. I could NOT believe it. I was ready to test my line-standing endurance with this one but nope.

Our first ride was in the back row.

YO. How is this ride legal?? It does NOT feel safe at all, holy shit. From the first drop until you hit the brake run, IT SENDS YOU. I was actually so terrified that I kept my hands down for the whole first half until it made its way back through the smaller hills but even then, I was flying out of my seat and being flung about like a ragdoll. I will not lie to you – this coaster was insane, incredible, and definitely a bucket lister, but HOO BOY brace yo’selves because this thing will try to play the accordion with your vertebrae.

Came back later for a spin on the front row and I am here to tell you that while I’m usually a certified backseater, the front row was my favorite. It was less painful and just more of a pleasant ride – OK perhaps “pleasant” is being too kind. It is still like going off-roading down a Transylvanian cliffside on the devil’s chariot pulled by drunk centaurs.

Completely fucking terrifying.

God please do not disturb the operator. Last year, two trains crashed into each other in the station because of operator error, so…let’s give the operator some peace & quiet, mmm.

Anyway, when Chooch and I rode it in the front seat, Henry sat behind us and had a decidedly very different ride experience from ours. While we were like YEAH THAT WAS THE SHIT, he was more like DID SOMEONE SHIT, LIKE THE STUFF THAT’S NOW IN MY PANTS? He said it was super rough and that his seat was moving forward!? I was like, “Bro you’re lying” and he was like, “No really, my SEAT WAS MOVING FORWARD DURING THE RIDE.”

Chooch and I were like, “OK sure cya sucker” and got back in line. This time, we sat in the second row in order to get a walk-on. It happened to be the same train that we had previously rode and not gon’ lie, I did notice that the seat seemed to be jutting out a good six inches farther than the other seats??

And OK fine I agree with Henry, this was the scariest journey of the three. First of all, my hair was in my face the whole time so I couldn’t see anything, and it just felt like if there was a wooden coaster built to represent Pittsburgh in all of its pot-holed glory – this was it. Step right up for Pittsburgh: The Ride. But in Michigan.

I was HOWLING. It was still fun, kinda (??), but dear Lord did I have the regertz. And fine Henry, the seat was definitely moving. I didn’t feel it so much on my side but by the time we got back to the station, Chooch had moved so far up in his seat that he was now pushed against the lap bar and could barely unfasten his seatbelt, lol wow ugh.

I definitely couldn’t marathon this like I could marathon, say, Phoenix at Knoebels, so 3 rides was enough for me that day. Would have loved to have experienced a night ride on this sadistic hunk of lumber, but when a park closes at 8pm in July, it’s pretty hard to unlock that achievement.

Yeah this ride was….something else. I bought the t-shirt.

(Gotta end with my favorite coaster youtuber’s video from Michigan’s Adventure because there is some good footage of Shivering Timbers and Ryan always provides the best reviews and explanations of coasters and their elements – plus I love when his friend Uncle Nate is with him. I ship Uncle Nate and Janna!!)

If someone asks me what my favorite song is, my mind literally wants to melt because I just can’t choose! Band, yes. Song? No!

But with movies, it has always been nearly my whole life these three: Pee Wee’s Big Adventure, Back to the Beach, and The Lost Boys. I have various memorabilia for the first two but it occurred to me recently that I have nothing for The Lost Boys!

It’s what my 1980s Dream Kitchen has been missing.

Then I found this artist on Etsy who does parody takes on VHS covers of mostly 80s movies and when I saw that there was one for The Lost Boys, I snatched that (you missed) sucker right up.

I really really really like this so much because the art style is like something I would have done in my fake artist days. Outsider art forever.

Anyway, as you can plainly see, this is not in my kitchen. That’s because after I bought this, I found an art print that was even MORE My Kitchen-y!

We hung it right across from the Corey Cabinets, so now I’m surrounded by Corey Power every time I enter the kitchen. It’s my safe space.

I truly think that this is a PERFECT MOVIE. It is TIMELESS. The casting is chef’s kiss. The location is 1980s summer utopia.

The soundtrack has not one skippable track (my ONLY complaint is that they used nary a Cure song, but Mummy Calls softens that blow a bit). It is probably the movie I know the most by-heart than anything else and I can still remember the very first time I ever saw it, when my Aunt Susie rented it after it came out on video and brought it over and I laid on the family room watching it and thinking Corey Haim was OMFG SO RAD and I wanted to be Star!!

And it was the best feeling ever to get to experience Chooch’s first time watching it when he was little – he was 2 and we had to buy him Lost Boys figurines because he loved it so much. His third birthday cake was the Lost Boys movie poster and he was Death By Stereo for Halloween when he was….8? 9? I dunno but it was 2015. I can’t math right now.

So yeah, it was time to get some Lost Boys art up on these walls! Now to get some Lost Boys art that lights up….

Henry?

I made it through June, which ended way better than it began minus some trailer park-ish drama. Now summer really feels like it’s here and I’m thriving – until the end of my month when my bday rolls around and I will succumb to one-day depression maybe probably depending on how well I’m being paid attention to. I think it should be fine though because we’ll be visiting my long-time friend in Cure obsession & Tolhursting alone, ALYSON!

In an effort to break up the amusement park posts, here’s a photo dump from the last week or so.

Vans Crew! I was stupidly excited when I realized that I was wearing the same shoes as Henry’s grandkids, Calvin and Lily, so we needed a photo, stat. Obviously Henry was not invited to participate.

I got this cute Richard Simmons talking figure at The Rocket in Ypsilanti last weekend & he looks hot AF on my kitchen shelf of 1980s figureheads.

All of these cars belong to HNC, yes even the one that’s behind an entirely different house up there, and this does not include the car that he actually drives every day. (He doesn’t drive any of the other ones! And the one in the forefront is his wife’s and how that one is up on blocks suddenly?!

I don’t get it. Chooch’s nemesis Larry is the same exact way – his whole driveway looks like a junkyard!! Just an FYI for anyone new here, we actually live in the city and not like some rural area where this is more accepted!!

When we came home at one point on Sunday, we couldn’t pull our own car down the driveway because HNC had his one driveable car pulled down there too because he was WORKING ON IT!? I see a lot of dumb shit around here but I am just actually rendered speechless by this.

Here is me at work last week! It was a day that definitely drained some / a lot of the novelty out of the whole “BACK IN THE CITY” sensation thanks to sleazy ass motherfuckers on the street being sleazy ass motherfuckers. I have been trying to avoid this one part of town since I’ve been back because the pandemic really turned it into some Mad Max type of bullshit, but I had to get to the Heinz History Center’s gift shop that day to get Chooch’s homestay some local gifts, thus forcing me to walk a way I have been avoided. And, as though on cue, some Jonny Craig-looking motherfucker with a face full of prison tattoos called out to me, “HEY TAKE ME HOME WITH YOU” and threw his body into some repulsive throat-sloughing laugh.

Then he said something else and my ears did me a favor by going into survival mode and closing off so I thankfully avoided hearing what came next.

Ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh.

I never get hit on by any savory types!!!

This week at work, I treated myself to a strawberry matcha latte from Adda. Worth it.

Ugh you guys. On that note, it’s been a really weird week adjusting to a Chooch-less house. I know this month will blow past, summer mths always do, and obviously I’m so glad that he wanted to do this and that we were able to help make it happen (his academic scholarship only went so far, people!) but it’s been disorienting, and I have been off my game big time, especially at work I feel like.

Also, two nights ago my left eye started burning and when I took my contact out, it unleashed a whole ass world of hurt upon me. The pain flooded in so fast and hard that I couldn’t keep my eye open, like my eyelid was like, “LET ME DO MY JOB” and kept forcing my eye shut, like closing a curtain on the veritable fucking acid bath going on behind it. Holy fuck, I have no idea what happened, but it hurt SO BAD that I could barely sleep all night. My eye was watering so hard that my whole left side of my face was like a 1980s art deco penthouse water feature. The pain was medieval, like an eyelash-sized sword slashing my prized orbital parts and I was actually terrified that somehow I had ripped my eyeball maybe?!!?

Holy shit, I was miserable. Obviously I wore my glasses all day yesterday and then it felt like I had allergies, like really hardcore hay fever. I was a dripping, sneezing, eye-squirting mess all day. I actually thought I was being punished for something. Then! Because I hadn’t slept hardly at all that night, the last hour of work was excruciating because I was so exhausted that I kept doing “eyes rolling back” and “snoring-while-awake” routine. You guys, I was SO TIRED that I TOOK A NAP after work. Granted it was for less than an hour and then I woke up panicked about my step-count, because WHAT IS MY LIFE, but yeah – that’s how bad this whole thing was and Henry kept asking, “NOW do you want to go to the doctor?” and I’m like, “NO! IT HASN’T EVEN BEEN A WEEK SINCE I HAD TO GO TO LABCORP FOR A WELLNESS CHECK AND GET BLOOD DRAWN!” Bitch, I can only handle so much HEALTH CARE in my life, and there is still A BRUISE AND BAND-AID RESIDUE in the crook of my right arm from THE BLOODLETTING because I am too scared to wash/scrub it off since that area MIGHT STILL BE TENDER FROM THE NEEDLE. I cannot GO TO ANOTHER MEDICAL THING while I still have REMNANTS FROM THE LAST MEDICAL THING on my person!!!!

Anyway, my eye was fine all day until around 6:00 and then it got weird again but not nearly like it was the other night and it’s not even red this time so fingers crossed that it’s just some allergic reaction to who knows what because nothing has changed in my house and I fucking swear to god if I’m suddenly allergic to the squirrels….

OK bye.

We’re not allowed to use the word “general” at my job so now I feel like a real bad ass, rule-breaker.

Michigan’s Adventure is part of the Cedar Fair group (Cedar Point, King’s Island, Knott’s, etc) and it is pretty much considered the worst park across the board by enthusiasts and general public. But when you’re an enthusiast, you will go to where you need to go in order to add the new coaster credits under the proverbial belt. (I’ve mentioned coaster creds to several different people recently and they all asked the same thing: “what do you get if you collect the most? like a prize?” Nope. Just bragging rights? A beefy spreadsheet? Debt?) And the thing about Michigan’s Adventure that was appealing to us, well, two things:

1. Shivering Timbers, this motherwhompin’ CCI woodie that is like THE TALK of Coaster Town – we will get to that in a separate post;
2. It’s in the same state as Bill & Jessi so we got to visit them!

Michigan’s Adventure is located in Muskeon, MI which is where the minor league hockey team was that then-Pittsburgh Penguins Phil Borque got sent down to during one of the seasons in the 1980s. That was the first time I ever heard of “Muskegon” and pretty much the last time too until Michigan’s Adventure. So I always associate Muskegon with Phil Borque and thought about that a lot the day we were there, and also how back in the 80s he dated my aunt Susie’s friend Lori!!!

Anyway, my first impression was that the parking lot is a nightmare – the park had already been open for an hour and there was a huge line of cars trying to get in. I panicked and thought it was going to be crowded that day, but no – parking was just slow AF. Then the car that parked next to us, OMG I’m getting angry all over again remembering this, the passenger got out and proceeded to stand next to our car, blocking my door, while the driver of his car got out and stood there so that he could slowly and languidly apply sunscreen to her stupid person skin. I was like REALLY? REALLY? REALLY?!!? and then said FUCK IT and started opening my door until it was in danger of hitting the guy. He got the hint and they both moved down so that I could out, but now they were blocking Chooch’s door LOLOLOL OMFG MORONS. Chooch was like, “I’m not playing this game” and just scooted across the backseat and got out from the other side.

Idiots.

Getting into the park from there was smooth-sailing.  My immediate reaction was, “This place is not so bad!” Visually, I mean! We had yet to experience ride ops and customer service. WE SHALL SEE.

(Well, we already saw, but pretend with me that we’re going to find out together.)

…do Henry and Chooch count as friends? I hope so because they’re the only people I ever hang out with!

The Ferris wheel wasn’t running but I liked how it looked here behind the trees.

Let’s talk ambiance: this is a small park, but it’s cute and clean. I love parks that have lakes either next to them or in the middle – this one had really cute swan boats that you can see over yonder!

And I liked that the colors of the benches gave off a 1970s summer camp vibe.

It’s hard to fuck up soft serve (never mind, I’ve seen it done before) and  this one was simple and satisfying! (Although my one small complaint is that nowhere on the signs did it mention sprinkles so we had to ask. I expected them  to say no since it wasn’t listed anywhere, BUT THEY HAD IT! I’m sorry, but soft serve without sprinkles is like grilled cheese without ketchup.)

Stalking us while we were in line for Corkscrew. Then, in true Michael Myers fashion, I turned back around a second later and HE WAS GONE. How does he dip so fast like that? He must have learned it in the SERVICE.

Could this have been the least-worst Arrow corkscrew I’ve ever ridden?? It was smooooth and my head banged not even once. Also, the line was only about 20 minutes long which is appropriate. The longest line we probably stood in was for Thunderhawk, the Vekoma SLC, which was maybe around 30 minutes. Ops were decent here?!

Here’s Chooch ignoring me in line for said Vekoma SLC. I want to note, as evidence to support my earlier claims about ride ops: this one had ONE KID manning the general entrance to  the station, the Fast Lane entrance to the station, and checking the restraints on the left side of the train. ONE KID, barely any older than Chooch. He was getting the job DONE.

Also, I believe this was the only instance of LINE JUMPING we endured all day,  thank god. It was still frustrating though – a whole ass family of 4 or 5 “excuse me, pardon me”ing their way all the way up to the front. Annoying!!!! I wish I owned a park. I would enforce the rules and motherfuckers would be crying.

And probably suing too but we’ll tackle that when the day comes.

I should note that this was the third ride of the day, right after getting in A HUGE FIGHT with Henry on the second ride of the day: the carousel. Who fights on the carousel?? you might ponder. The couple who is 1/2 comprised of a camera-moron whose only task is to take a carouselfie of his family but does it shittily every time and then gets mad in retaliation when the other 1/2 gets mad first, and their offspring just sits there on his pony and endures it because, this is life. This is us.

Anyway, we got off the carousel and I was like LET’S JUST LEAVE but then proceeded to storm off in the opposite direction of the exit. Chooch kept pace with me but Henry was like, way behind. I dipped into the Thunderhawk line hoping that Henry wouldn’t know where we went but apparently he has us chipped because when we got off the ride, he was waiting for us like a dumb creep. Ugh. Then we were Happy Family again and didn’t fight anymore, look at us. That’s growth.

Zack’s Zoomer is a little wooden coaster that had what looked to be a short line but it was one train ops and suuuuuper slow moving.

We got to the station and I realized it was basically just like the Woodstock Express and I was like, “There is no fucking way we’re both fitting in one seat,” but Henry was like, “YES WE CAN” and he stuffed himself in next to me so hard that I felt my hipbone bend, I swear to god. I honetsly can’t believe that the ride ops let us sit together, it was sooo clown car-esque.

Chooch had to wait for the next train and he seemed fine with having a big of PARENT FREE time.

Bye, Chooch. Say “wheeee.”

OMG this fucking janky pile of lumber, lol. When we were standing in line, some really annoying, corny country ballad came on, something about “this is my song,” and I loudly said, “Who even likes this shit??” and Henry started cracking up because the three teenage girls in front of us where balls-to-the-wall lip synching along but I didn’t know because I had my back toward them when I was screaming about it.

I just think that amusement parks should exclusively play 1980s music.

I thought the station was so nice, how they had flower pots hanging over there.

Anyway, this ride was sooooo painful. The first part was great though – you leave the station and wind around into a tunnel and Y’ALL KNOW HOW I LOVE ME SOME TUNNELS. Then you go up the lift hill and get stuck at the top for a minute – at least, that’s what happened to us. Then the first drop is SO GOOD because it was recently RETRACKED so it was smoother than Rob Thomas singing “Smooth.”

But then as you’re going down the hill, you happen to look over to the right and notice that the rest of the coaster is OLD ASS WOOD TRACK and while you’re realizing this, the JACKHAMMERING BEGINS. Holy fuck, this was definitely up there with some of the roughest woodies I’ve ever willingly put myself through. Henry and I were bellowing our chorus of OWs like a couple of fallen angels taking their first waltz along the fiery coals of Hell.

Hey, GCI – bring some more of that smooth-ass track to Michigan, stat.

We didn’t ride this, but I thought the sign was cyoooooot.

Did I say Thunderhawk was the longest line we stood in that day? Scratch that bring it back, because it was actually Mad Mouse. We were prepared for this after watching numerous videos about how bizarre the ops are on this one, plus these damn wild mouse rides are GP faves so they always amass long lines no matter what.

Chooch was being such a baby about having to wait in line! Like we had anything else to do! I think he was really ready to leave because, GOD FORBID, his phone was dying/had died. Here’s a picture of Henry and Chooch talking about block zones and trying to understand why they were only allowing two cars on the course at once.

It really wasn’t that bad, waiting in this line. I think it was probably about 45 minutes (I mean, OK that’s pretty pathetic to wait that long for a wild mouse, but coaster creds make you do some dumb things). And it was actually a pretty decent ride!

After this, we stopped in the gift shop and bought some shirts (um, for one of the smallest, least-loved Cedar Fair parks, they have some great merch!), then made our way out of the park having ridden all of the coasters. Shivering Timbers was the highlight and you can let me fangirl about that in a separate post, if that’s OK with you. Cool, thanks!

Buh-bye, Michigan’s Adventure! You were not nearly as terrible as I had imagined. Hopefully Cedar Fair throws you a bone in the form of a new coaster and we will definitely come back!

Yo, I still haven’t recapped our day at Michigan’s Adventure because I’m a shit blogger.

And now I’m all, “wah, I miss my kid” like I sent him off to war. Henry said he was surprised at how much maternal emotions are actually contained within my standoffish self.

Haha ugh.

That being said (I watch this one coaster review channel on YouTube and they say this so often that I blurt it out when I think they’re going to say it, like it’s some totally stimulating game I play by myself because I have no friends, so now I’m accidentally saying it in my head all the time during my normal non-coaster working hours, so that’s great), here are some pictures of Chooch looking like he’s….

….at the DMV;

waiting to have dental work done;

at jury duty but it’s a boring case; (side bar: Chooch had to rode with that kid and he was petty unhappy about it lololol.)

having a nervous breakdown while babysitting his next-door niece and nephews;

trying to sit on the couch but it’s full of my library books;

HAVING THE BEST DAY EVER WITH HIS MOMMY (and dumb dad, not pictured) AT MICHIGAN’S ADVENTURE!

He actually *was* pretty unsufferable toward the end of the day but he was mostly a delight.

I miss him. It’s fine.

It’s not fine. IT’S ONLY GOING TO GET HARDER! COLLEGE! MOVING OUT!! ETC ETC!!!

2:39AM: A trio of bickering and we haven’t even pulled out of the driveway yet! Chooch almost left without his phone charger and now I’m the bad guy for asking him if he has it, I guess.

Also, Henry cleaned my glasses for me and it’s like looking out of, well, glass. Is this how it was always supposed to be?!

3:07am: been in the check-in line for 3 minutes and two people have asked me questions so far as if I know anything?!

3:18am: I know this is going to shock everyone but we’ve been here for 20 minutes and the American Airlines check in counter has been empty. But 6 of them are now slowly walking out and we’re all like “shut up” when one of them called out good mornings all sing-songily. It’s 3:00am gtfo.

3:56am: At the gate. Henry and I got PARENT PASSES to come all the way with him – I’m sure he is SO happy about this considering he sniped, “you’re so embarrassing” 8x in the last 10 minutes.

I almost took this with the flash on so that probably would have really sent him over the edge lololol.

4:45am: Now we have Dunkin’ Donuts and Henry is waiting in line somewhere else to get Chooch to big boy food. “I’m excited for this ‘home style breakfast.'”

Henry, bearer of bad news, just strutted over to tell Chooch that they don’t have pancakes today and he took the liberty of substituting it with toast. Chooch is not happy about this. Henry walked away and Chooch said, “asshole” in a super conversational tone and I don’t know why, probably because of the whole “2 hours of sleep” thing, but I can’t stop laughing.

Oh yeah! Since we couldn’t send Doll to Mexico with Chooch, we took pictures of her to put in his suitcase as a surprise:

5:15am: There is another CIEE kid here!!! We wanted Chooch to say hi and he said “I’ll say in Mexico.” WOW LOL. Now he’s trying to hide his shirt and avoid her but her dad looked right at him so we’ll see how this plays out.

5:52am: Well, he’s all boarded. Henry said he wished he took a picture of us hugging because it was so awkward considering I usually always slap or flick him to show affection. I’m crying, guys. This sucks.

Henry’s trying to flex his airplane knowledge. “They took the chocks out so the plane should be moving soon.”

6:21am: Just watched the plane take off. I’m a mess.

This is Henry’s version of “sad” I guess.

6:33am: Whelp. Chooch’s plane had to land because the lady behind him passed out and they’re doing CPR so now we’re going back to the gate. We had JUST gotten off the shuttle too and managed to jump back on before the doors closed because otherwise I think we would have had to go through security again and I don’t think our Gate Passes would have still worked since his flight had technically departed.

6:55am: lady has been brought off on stretcher. They’re still doing CPR. :/

While we’re killing time waiting for takeoff part 2, here’s a picture of Chooch’s Bon Voyage dinner, which I had hoped would be at a decent restaurant but when we left it up to him, he just kept suggesting Applebees because of that stupid country song that I hate and I was really trying to internalize my dissatisfaction with this choice since it was for HIS Bon voyage dinner not mine, but then he looked at the menu and realized that there is nothing for us to eat there so then he settled for take out from Moonlit Burgers because they have impossible burgers.

He was actually SO NICE all day yesterday and even treated us like human beings. It was almost as if he realized he was leaving for a month and might miss us.

7:16am: now everyone is getting off the plane.

(Everyone is saying that the lady had a heart attack.)

LOOK WHO’S BACK.

I just asked him if it was scary and he said, “no. I’m a sociopath.” And then cracked up. Wow.

8:13am: REBOARDING. I GET TO RE-CRY TOO I GUESS.

P.S. Apparently that other CIEE kid is going somewhere else not Merida because Henry just talked to chooch’s chaperone and she didn’t mention any other kids that she will be waiting for??!!

8:56am: Getting ready for takeoff part 2. *fingers crossed* He’s going to be cutting it super close for his connecting flight. Went from a 3-hour layover to basically having about 30 minutes to get to the gate, hopefully his chaperone is actually there. I hate this so much.

9:08am: He’s in the air. Attempting to leave the airport for the second time today.

9:22am:

Outside! I missed you!

10:24am: Went home for a second, consoled the cats after they did a Human Count and realized Chooch was missing, tossed some peanuts to Mr. Gray Guy, and then we came back out to Allegro’s to get some of their morning buns because I am honestly not going to be able to sit still and relax until I know that Chooch has made his connecting flight and is safe in Merida this day is so stressful. How will I ever send him off to college?!!!

Meanwhile, I imagine Chooch is on the plane, watching Better Call Saul, and giving zero fucks about anything because that kid does not know anxiety.

Dude this was good and sort of helped make me feel better…until it made me sick because I ate the whole damn thing ugh.

11:40pm: OK he landed at 12:20 and is off the plane. His CIEE chaperone is not there like she said she would be because why should anything go according to plan, but his gate is at least in the same terminal so he just has to get there. I might puke up that orange roll.

11:46am: Update from Chooch – “you guys are so annoying. I’m trying to walk.” Wow sorry for worrying.

12:38pm: He should be taking off soon! I’m tracking his flight because I’m Stalker Mom. I’m going to go live with this post now but will for sure update when he lands in Merida. Thank you for taking this virtual journey with me lol!

2:11pm: I keep obsessively refreshing the flight tracker. He has like 40 minutes. Since I last left you, I made progress on getting Mr. Gray Guy (a squirrel) to love me and I took a whole ass 30 minute nap, who even am I? A nap?! I mean, I guess I’ve been awake since 2:15AM.

Earlier today Henry was like, “we should have just driven him to Miami for that flight,” and after approx. 1.3 seconds of letting this spin cycle thru my empty mind like a ratty dryer sheet, I cried, “Why didn’t we??!!” I mean, Henry and I weren’t even traveling today but it was just reminder after the next of why I hate flying so much. It’s the whole fucking process for me. TSA especially. I fucking hate it. Travelers are already so stressed and harried and tired but then they gotta contend with these motherfuckers whose job prerequisite is SCHOOL BULLY.

Pittsburgh TSA sucks.

3:13pm: OK he’s there! I only know because of the stalking I’ve been doing not because he had the decency to text to me. He did, however, texted Henry: where’s my immigration form because of fucking course sonny boy didn’t listen to a word we told him the whole 6 hours we were in the airport together this morning but mmm ok.

Anyway, I’ll probably end this here. I’m ok now that he’s there and I will probably continue to be OK until we have to do this all over again in reverse on August 6th god help me.

ETA: I can’t believe I forgot these pertinent tidbits (though I have a vague recollection of typing them so they probably didn’t save because WordPress is trash):

• the reason everyone had to get off the plane was because it had done a “hard landing” meaning that it made an emergency landing with nearly a full tank which is apparently not great for the plane and can cause stress so it needed to be inspected. The American Airlines guy at the gate kept us pretty well-informed about this which I appreciated but this part freaked me out: the maintenance crew is BASED IN DALLAS so they were essentially walking the Pittsburgh team through the inspection over the phone?!?!
• Before all the passengers got off the plane, the lady who had the heart attack was wheeled off on a stretcher. They had to bring her off into the gate and then take her onto an elevator to get her back out onto the tarmac where the ambulance was. We saw them doing CPR still as they put her in the ambulance, and at this point it had been at least a half an hour since Chooch had texted me to say that they landed.
• After the incident happened on the plane, one of the passengers gave her CPR. That passenger was standing near us when everyone got off the plane and people were going up to her and thanking her for helping. One guy was super choked up when he thanked her so I can only imagine how traumatic it must have been for everyone who witnessed it. I asked Chooch if it was upsetting and he said, “No not really but I’m a sociopath” because that’s what I always call him because his ambivalence is shocking at times.
• Henry went to Brueggers while we were waiting for the plane to be inspected and the co-pilot was in there telling everyone what happened. He said it was literally right during take off and he knew it was bad because normally they’re not allowed to make emergency landings until they’re above a certain altitude but they were given the all-clear because “a passenger wasn’t breathing.” I literally cannot even imagine.
• I got to talk to Chooch for a millisecond tonight after he got to his homestay. He told me, “I dunno sure I’m tired bye” whatever that means. We still don’t even know he was able to get his luggage because that apparently isn’t an important enough question for him to answer.
• I legit can’t stop thinking about that lady and I wasn’t even on the plane. I really hope that she’s ok. :(