Part two of the highly anticipated Christmas Eve 2023 series (?? lol ok) is finally here, everyone. You can read this and then sleep peacefully, knowing that you will be granted entrance to 2024 with the knowledge of how some idiot broad in Pittsburgh spent her December holidays, etc.

We offered to host this year and switched it to Christmas Eve because my dad usually has a small dinner on Christmas with Ryan and Corey so it’s just less stressful all around to do it on a different night. Plus, I thought it would be nice to spend actual Christmas, just the three of us, with no rushing around, cleaning, cooking, etc. (LITTLE DID I KNOW THAT I WOULD BE SPENDING IT DOING NOTHING BUT SLEEPING AND MOANING ON MY DEATH BED.)

Earlier that day, Janna texted me and said that Christmas was cancelled with her family because both of her sisters were sick so I was like OMG COME TO MY HOUSE THEN! And she was like OK! And even brought krumkake! (Did I already talk about this, Leroy? It feels like I may have.)

Anyway, here in this photo, she’s sitting next to Chooch on the church pew looking like someone accused her of voter fraud.

Ew, ham.

Henry also made the vegan Wellington again! But this time he used the School Night Vegan recipe which is very intense and involved. I thought it turned out SO WELL(ington) but sadly, I was not able to eat any leftovers due to the Christmas Stomach Expulsion of 2023. Lowk (I JUST LEARNED THAT THE KIDS TYPE THIS INSTEAD OF LOWKEY – THAT IS NOT A TYPO), I can’t even really bear to type about the food because, you know, aversions, etc etc.

Oh god. I really really really thought when I first got sick in the middle of the night that I had just mixed too many different wines because I was feeling FUCKING FESTIVE that night and glugged my fucking face off.

I was trying to take guerrilla, candid spy pics way too quickly and they kept coming out blurry. Am I fucking spastic or just getting old? Pretty soon, I’ll have a forever-smudge on my camera lens that everyone else will notice but me.

At some point, Corey asked for an extra napkin after I thought I made it clear this was a “one napkin per diner” event, so I grudgingly gave him one because Christmas Spirit. And you know what he needed it for? TO CAPTURE TWO STINKBUGS* which he then presented to me like some Hero Exterminator on the way to throwing it in the garbage.

I screamed, and I mean SCREAMED, “OMG you didn’t kill them, did you?? We don’t kill stink bugs in this house!!” and he was so taken aback by this, like he truly thought I was joking. Thank god he hadn’t squashed them yet, and I made him release them immediately!!! MERRY CHRISTMAS, STINKBUG BABIES!!

*(I typed stinkboys at first and now that’s what I want to call them going forward.)

Don’t even get me started on the desserts!! It ended up being FINE but I realized really late into the week that we hadn’t even considered this part of the meal and I felt bad putting even more tasks on Henry’s shoulders, so I suggested we just go and pick up dessert from a bakery. The day before, we went to Prantl’s and of course it was slim pickins because hello, most places have holiday pre-orders but we missed the deadline for everywhere. There were two pies sitting on a table – cherry and berry, I think, neither of which caught my eye – so Henry asked, “You don’t happen to have an apple pie in the back, do you?”

OH OK suddenly taking initiative which, you know, great, sit Ubu sit good boy, but when it comes to DESSERT MATTERS, we need to DISCUSS THIS FIRST. Hello, side bar? So, now I’m fuming that he did this without consulting me because I didn’t WANT an apple pie? And then the Prantl’s lady was SO STOKED as she came back with the LAST ONE and I was like, “Yay, I guess we’re having apple pie for Christmas.” So of course I threw a fit in the car as we left (I am a monster, you don’t have to say it behind my back. These are very popular facts that have been wildly known for 44 years) and Henry was all, “LISTEN HERE, QUEEN B, DO YOU WANT ME TO GO BACK” and I was like “NO!!” which clearly translates to YES. He went back and also got two tortes (they are Pittsburgh Famous for their burnt almond tortes, FYI) and everyone was happy so Christmas wasn’t ruined.

Post-dinner VR. We were watching Johnny’s rollercoaster POVs from vacation!

The way that Chooch was dressed like he was going to the beach after dinner, though.

Siblings!

Also, post-dinner, we started talking about all of my blind dates, for some reason, and I kept holding up my phone to show the table pictures of these guys (and girl). Ryan goes, “How are you pulling up these pictures so fast?” and I was like, “Oh, I’m just searching their names on my blog!”

Duh.

UGH this fucking game. Codewords. I was half-drunk by this point and had a hard time focusing.

Chooch was my teammate and you can tell he was very happy about this.

Ryan and my mom had left by then lol.

Corey on a “work call” while drinking “coffee” from the Olson Twins coffee cup I got him, lol.

Corey’s Famous Spinach Dip.

EK, XMAS EVE 2023

Overall, it was a nice evening. No drama. Good company. Lots of laughs! Wish this had carried over to the next day, LOLOLOLOLLLLL.

(P.S. There was kind of drama when Chooch leaned over and clicked “follow” on the Instagram of a girl he goes to school with, causing her to text him, “Your mom requested to follow me on Instagram!” which isn’t embarrassing at all.)

Friday, August 17th was another BEEP BEEP WAKE UP MOTHERFUCKER Stupid:Early AM wakeup call. We were taking a 2+ hour bus ride to Tampere, Finland in order to visit our last park of the trip: Sarkanniemi. First, we had to embark on a short trip to the bus station. I would have preferred to take a train, which is faster, but apparently there was some issue / construction going on with the track somewhere, so we would have had to transfer to a bus at some point anyway. (According to google, a bus ride to Tampere is about 2 hours and 45 minutes which seems longer than what our trip was, but OK.

After not getting back from Tallinn until after 1:30AM, we were D R A G G I N G. But that’s the life of a coaster enthusiast, I guess! (I don’t know what I’m talking about it.)

I have to be honest here, this bus ride was the most uncomfortable mode of transportation we experienced the ENTIRE trip. The bus was a double-decker, but it was TIGHT and also? It was completely sold-out. I thought this was kind of curious since it was a Friday morning, why were all these people (ALL COLLEGE STUDENT-AGED, IT APPEARED) going to Tampere?? It was just a shit ton of mostly young girls who had no couth, no spatial- or self-awareness, one was watching cartoons on her laptop with no headphones, one was practically sprawled out in the aisle so people struggled to pass her when they needed to get to the bathroom, and it was HOT AF in there. Just very uncomfortable, honestly, and made me feel like I was in America.

But you know, it was a cheap ticket I imagine (Henry booked it, what do I know) and it got us there in decent time. That’s when we:

1. had to find a local bus to get us to the park;
2. learned that the reason hordes of YOUTH were flocking to Tampere was because Blockfest, a big hip hop festival, was happening. Apparently, Ice Spice was there lol.

Sarkanniemi is not a very big park, but it does have some coasters and I liked that it sits along Näsijärvi Lake. Aesthetics matter. 

Right away, Chooch and I ran to the line for Tornado, which ended up being a walk-on. Henry was being a bitch because he thought it looked too much like an SLC and opted out:

(NOT MY PICTURE; FROM WEBSITE)

But yoooo, this was excellent! Also, the guy in front of us was wearing a Six Flags eyeglass strap, a Busch Gardens t-shirt, and had a vlogging camera. “Chooch, that guy is definitely American,” I said, nudging him with my elbow. “I’m going to talk to him when we get off!”

“Please don’t,” he mumbled.

BUT I DID, AND YEAH BOY, ANOTHER AMERICAN THOOSIE! We had a nice chat with him – he’s from Atlanta and needed to use up some PTO time at work and was like, “Finland it is!” So that was really cool – we told him all about our trip too and he was just very nice to talk to and didn’t act like he was too cool for us or whatever. (I WISH I COULD REMEMBER HIS YOUTUBE NAME!! I subscribed to it on the spot but can’t find it in my list.)

Anyway, right after that, we started walking to the next coaster and Henry goes, “OMG look who it is!” AND IT WAS ROBERT, DAWN, AND ARNOLD FROM COASTER CREW!!!!!

OMG I was so happy to see them!!! We spent the next several hours riding everything with them and it was THE BEST WAY TO END THE TRIP. 100%.

We took over the kiddie coaster like old times!

I…don’t know why I took this picture.

This was A NO for me. Totally uncomfortable. One and done. Actually, aside from Tornado and the flat rides, it was a one-and-done themed park for sure.

I miss these people. Also, this was a fun log flume!

At some point, we lost our friends because we needed to eat and I think they left because they had already been there for a bit before we arrived. :( Their plan was to go to Power Park farther up in Finland the next day, and then Robert and Dawn were heading home on Sunday, but Arnold was heading to Tallinn. Chooch gave him the heads up on the +1 credit there “because I’m a nice guy,” he said.

Gorgina!!! (Any Ur Mom stans here?)

I think that this park is really clean and I love the pops of color. I think they also a great and quirky collection of flat rides, but if they could get one outstanding coaster to pair up with Tornado for that one-two punch, I think this park could be taken to the next level. As it stands, unless you have little kids and pay extra for the separate “Doghill Fairytale Farm” petting zoo and aquarium, this is not a full-day park and not worth the visit to Tampere alone (Tampere has plenty of other things going for it though so it is still 100% worth visiting and I’m actually disappointed that we didn’t allow ourselves more time to explore outside of the park before having to rush back to catch our bus back to Helsinki!).

Another Euro-park, another fantastic bathroom!

For a second, I couldn’t remember why we didn’t end up eating here but then I remembered it was because we found out another place had vegan hotdogs!

Chooch just came home and exclaimed, “You’re still talking about this!?” Um, if by talking you mean blogging, then yes. (Although blogging really is like talking to my stuffed animals, all lined up on the couch with cups of tea duct-taped to their hands. HOLD ON, HAROLD, I’LL TAKE YOU TO THE BATHROOM AS SOON AS I FINISH THIS PARAGRAPH, JESUS CHRIST.)

Immediately squirts mustard on himself.

Yeah, this ‘dog was worth the burger swap. Usually if a vegan dog is on the menu, it’s gonna be of the basic nuked store bought variety and those are so unsatisfying. I can make that myself in my own kitchen, bitch please.

I don’t know what this thing was but it was adorable, super antique-feeling, and just good old-fashioned fun.

Chooch probably disagreed.

Oh, I just looked it up and it’s literally called Lake Carousel. It’s spins and tilts but not very aggressively. You can imagine bitches from the past riding this in their floor length gowns and bonnets or whatever. (I don’t know how old this ride itself is but apparently the amusement park has been around since 1975 so it’s only slightly older than me, which ISN’T YOUNG.

LOL according to Wiki, this ride opened in 1996. So yeah, you can imagine bitches from the past riding this in their BUM Equipment sweatshirts and scrunchies or whatever.

FINLAND. <3

Even the car ride was one of the most scenic rides I’ve ever been on.

Henry and underwear friend.

Fun fact: Sarkanniemi means “Cape of Sandbank.”

I thought this was going to be popcorn-flavored ice cream but it was literally ice cream topped with popcorn lol.

Chooch was being a big crybaby over hot chocolate so don’t worry, big baby got his hot chocolate. Also, he was mildly pouting because there was supposed to be some stupid Angry Birds kiddie ride there and he roamed around aimlessly looking for it for the first hour before realizing that it had been rethemed to carrots, LOLOLOL.

I was so excited when I saw this weird game because I thought it was a Finnish thing but then later I found out that we have these here in America too, so.

Literally just did my Carouselfie 2023 post the other day so if you’ve already seen these, YES I KNOW I ALREADY POSTED THEM.

I really did have an enjoyable time here but 1/3 of a day is really all you need. One of the coasters was closed (no tears were shed about this though because it’s a Zamperla Volare coaster, which are AWFUL. Granted, I’ve only been on one in Canada’s Wonderland, but it’s not something I’d ever happily line-up for ever again.

By 3:30pm, we were ready to say goodbye and try to get a bus back to the bus station since our transfer had run out and we didn’t know where to go around there to get a new ticket. My favorite part of traveling! The bus driver was like, “Oh for God’s sake just get in and sit down” in so many Finnish words so yay! Thank you, Tampere public transportation!

By 4:22pm, we were on our bus back to Helsinki!

The bus ride back was WAY BETTER – not crowded and no annoying YOUNGS. (My actual “final night in Helsinki” post can be found here.

The next day, we left our airbnb at….4am I think??? It was ungodly. I don’t even want to think about that travel day, actually. Let’s just end the vacation here! I DID IT, I WRAPPED IT UP BEFORE THE END OF 2023!!! ONE WHOLE DAY TO SPARE!

Lessgitit.

1. Ladies Christmas Dinner

I had a nice little Christmas dinner with Megan, Marlene, and Debby earlier in the month at Alta Via in Market Square. It definitely lacked the quirkiness, charm, and Kermit of last year’s dinner spot, Zarra:

but our server also didn’t have to “run out to get tomatoes” for our salads, so at least our food came more expediently. I had a delightful beet salad and the pumpkin ravioli. Both were nice but the bread stole the show for me: homemade, warm salty rosemary focaccia? Yeah boy.

I sometimes have a really hard time being around people when it comes to conversation participation. For instance, I really like dining with this group but more often than not, I feel like I cannot hang verbally, like I am so socially stunted. At one point during dinner, the conversation took a hard left into health insurance talk and do I seem like someone who has ANYTHING to contribute to that topic swerve? The worst part was that this whole time, Ozark Mountain Daredevil’s Jackie Blue was gently wafting from the speakers like aural angel dust and I was DYING for a lull in the Medicare discourse to tell them my Barb Riley / Roller Skating Birthday Party / Jackie Blue story, like actually sitting on my hands and internally squealing. But they were still talking about benefits and Cobra well after the song ended while I helped myself to another piece of really delicious focaccia just to give my mouth something to do. I am subsisting alone in some weird adult limbo where I can only half-relate to most other adults but I mostly have nothing to contribute to the conversation.

I guess this is just who I am though and I need to accept that! Also, what a horrible but at least the waiter got the Christmas tree in the background?

2. Of 90s R&B Heart Throbs

1. 1. This is a two-fer!! Last night, my friend Veronica DMd me and was like, paraphrasing here, “Do you remember the group Debarge?” and then proceeded to reference EL DEBARGE SPECIFICALLY at which point I was like, “Imma just stop you right here, Veronica, because I was EL DEBARGE’S BIGGEST MOTHERFUCKIN’ FAN IN 1994!” And then it got even more exciting because she wasn’t aware of the specific El album that I was obsessed with (HEART MIND AND SOUL) so then I got to share my fave tracks with her and she told me that she saw Debarge when she was 7 and that they serenaded her aunt!!! Honestly though, the only bad thing about this album is that it makes me remember how fucking psycho I was over  A DUMB BOY and how I listened to this CD so much that I wore out TWO COPIES OF IT and the copy I currently own is #3.
   2. Today in Group Chat (I love that it sounds like it’s my weekly group therapy session and honestly, it actually kind of is) we were talking about 90s jams and then this happened:

And then I got to tell them MY PSYCHOTIC OBSESSION STORY and they were like, “Aw.” It felt good to tell them about “Susie from Clairton” though.

I wonder how many people from my life back then would be totally fucking triggered if they heard this song right now. I was a complete fool over this and probably Janna is the only one who supported it lol. I definitely have a home video of Evan scoffing HARD when I was like, “BUT FIRST!” and then pushing play on the cassette that I had slid into the tape deck in Lisa’s Jeep, queueing up my comfort jam. I terrorized a lot of people with this song. A LOT OF PEOPLE. Don’t worry, I totally don’t do that anymore. (Side note: for years, I could only find some alternate version of this on YouTube and Spotify, but this one is the real one!!!!) Enjoy!

3. HAECHAN CANDLE

I got a Haechan candle for Christmas from Megan! That’s all, I just wanted to share it:

4. Missing the Office

I know I have cried about this a zillion times in here since 2020, but man I really do miss seeing my work friends every day. I don’t miss the commute or getting ready, but I miss the crazy antics and shenanigans we’d have back in the day. It’s fun in group chat to recount these memories and make new virtual ones (like today when Nate reminded us that it’s the One Year Anniversary of Doug), but it’s not the same! Today, I was looking for something in my blog and came across this old post from 2018 that was all work-related and it made me laugh but then I was just kind of deflated, realizing that these days are definitely in the past, man.

And then it was a big love fest as we all wished each other a happy new year and said we appreciated each other before logging off. I dunno, it’s got me all maudlin, man.

(DREW, DON’T WORRY, YOU ARE STILL MY #1 CO-WORKER!!)

5. FREE WEEKENDS

Now that Henry finally finished the Seoul subway sign, we can start actually hanging out on weekends again! It’s going to be cold tomorrow, but I had a brunch that was cancelled so my day is wide open, and I want to go for a cemetery walk like we used to do before he became overwhelmed with chores. (Don’t get it twisted, he still has chores, just not super intense and intricate ones that require tons of labor like that sign did.)

I was sick almost all week and was watching travel vlogs from Lancaster, PA to comfort me (some people like hot tea, naps, and hot baths but I take solace in making fun of random travel vloggers on YouTubers and as luck would have it, A LOT of them choose Lancaster as a content destination) so now I want to do a day trip soft pretzel tour of Lancaster because that was one of the only foods I could think about and eat this week while sick. So maybe that will happen sometime in early 2024 and Chooch will likely POLITELY DECLINE the invite.

I ALSO WANT TO DO A DAY TRIP TO COLUMBUS TO EAT AT SEITAN’S REALM AGAIN.

***

Well, that’s all I have. Drink your water.

Love,

Susie from Clairton.

I still have one more amusement park to recap on here and hopefully I will get to that by the end of the year, but I wanted to skip ahead and do my annual Carouselfie Collection post! NONE are from the US! We did go to several US parks this year but they were ones where we already have carouselfies from, or they didn’t have a carousel (Fun Spot America).

So, with the exception of the first one pictured, these are all from our Coaster Crew trip, which makes them even more special to me! (Of course, none of these are printed, framed, and hung yet but it’s been a stupid several months).

First carouselfie of the year was also our first park of the year – Canada’s Wonderland! It was our first time visiting this pretty massive park right outside of Toronto and it was aight. I feel like the first park after a long, boring winter is always kind of weird – for me, at least – because I have to remember how to tolerate crowds.

I thought it was a really cute carousel though!

Next up was this crazy carousel in Denmark’s Bakken (the oldest amusement park in the world!) where you just run and jump on it while it’s still moving. Mmm, I wasn’t super OK with that, but I guess that’s the American sue-culture in me. But yeah, our first European carouselfie!

It doesn’t look so scary, but man, I really thought I was going to get a foot chopped off jumping on this thing.

NEXT UP: Tivoli Gardens, Copenhagen!

I wasn’t sure that I was going to be able to get a good carouselfie because Henry and I had to sit in a spinny thing so I tried to do a video edition instead. Don’t worry, that didn’t become a thing, lol.

OK stop – was Liseberg the best park of the trip? And was this also our first carouselfie in Sweden? Ugh, there are no lies here. We spent two days here and it was a goddamn dream. I hope to return here one day! I hope that Chooch has children someday and we can take them, too because this place was built on magic. Disney is cool, BUT LISEBERG BLEW MY HAIR BACK.

Fun fact – adults (Chooch included) aren’t allowed to ride on the animals on the carousel here so we had to sit in the spinny tea cup thing.

And lastly, here is the one that I haven’t actually recapped yet, but we did a day trip to Tampere in Finland and went to Sarkanniemi, which was….meh but super scenic and something really unexpected happened while we were there so I guess you will just have to check back and see if I ever get around to posting about it!

OK, that was fun. A bunch of carouselfies. I hope Chooch doesn’t think that he’ll be exempt from these once he starts college??

Still not feeling fully myself. I slogged through the workday yesterday (it’s amazing how it’s even a struggle working while sick even when you’re in the comfort of your own home) and I ended up getting a bit of my fever back last night. No more stomach issues since mid-Christmas Day at least! Anyway, in an effort to not get too behind in blogging, let’s look at pictures of pre-Christmas Eve dinner. I love setting things up while Henry is killing himself at the stove!

LOL I actually have no idea how to set a table. And crinkled napkins give it a rustic flavor, I feel like right? Or is Garbage Xmas the theme I was shooting for?

At least I straightened the fork before taking this picture.

Janna’s family was sick, so Christmas was postponed for her. I said, “NOT SO FAST” and invited her to our hobo Christmas Eve dinner. Our table, even with the leaf in place, isn’t meant to seat more than 6 comfortably so she and Corey had to squeeze in together at the end. I suggested that she just eat in the living room at the coffee table but Henry was like, “Erin.”

:D

Anyway, Janna’s family is Norwegian and she brought over a batch of her mom’s homemade krumkake – they were delightful! They’d kick pizzelles’ asses in a street fight.

Clown Buffet continues to be the best part of the house currently.

Poor Penelope doesn’t know yet that people are on their way. DON’T GET TOO COZY.

I can tell that I took this picture after some guests arrived because I see Corey’s “World Famous” spinach dip and rolls displayed in all of their “rogue recipe” glory up there. OK, this confirms that I’m still not ready to talk/think/write about food so I will end this here. Bye byeeeee.

Dude you guys. I have very little to say about Christmas Day because I legit spent 99% of it in bed with a stomach bug. I was able to come downstairs for about an hour that morning, having written off the night before as “too much mixed wine at Christmas Eve”  but then I quickly realized that nope, oh nope, this was a bug that was going to accompany me throughout the entire fucking day, ho ho ho.

Christmas Eve was much more festive so I will recap that once I am 100%. But for now, here are the only pictures I took along with a recap of who all gave Chooch his presents which is my favorite part of wrapping gifts!

He actually said, “Wait…who’s Doug? Oh, that guy.”

Waiting for Henry so he could start opening all of his presents from “other people.” This was the year of vinyl. It’s pretty much all he wanted.

Opening Penelope’s present for her because she was being a weirdo.

I got Henry some tool thing that I always see commercials for on YouTube. I dunno if he will ever have a use for it, but you’re welcome, from: Project Manager.

A selection of people from whom he received gifts this year:

• Fleece Radkins’ burrito
• The duct tape on Purple Pants‘ purple coat
• Justin signing Balder (“Wow, now I get presents from activities.”)
• The girl you sat behind on the Racer
• Your Czennie parents (Czennie – what NCT calls their fans. Chooch was pissed about this one lol)
• Marshall’s cigarette butt in Gronalund
• Raine’s dad
• Suez (one of my many nicknames for Drew and probably the one that Chooch hates the most)
• Unfinished college apps

I got a bunch of NCT Dream stuff, a new LALA coat, some Lolavie hair stuff, and probably bed sores from all the bed-laying I did :(

Last Saturday was Megan’s annual Christmas party and this year’s theme was a cocktail competition! I had every intention of participating but with all the stress and chaos of planning my own party the week before and then just life generally having me in a chokehold, I ended up delegating a cookie order to Henry so instead of half-assing a cocktail (it’s all or nothing with me, you guys; if I’m going to participate in a contest, it’s for gold, not for fun), we (haha “we”) full-assed a batch of jalapeno zucchini cookies with a lime glaze. Henry won a cookie contest off this recipe several years ago and it’s been our go-to cookie recipe ever since.

And by “go-to” I mean that he made them approx. one other time. I think it was when Chooch was making cookie care packages for Coronamas 2020.

Anyway, not everyone threw a drink into the cocktail ring, so I was relieved about that. I was perfectly happy to be a judge, though!

Lauren, Nate, and Amber were also there! And Megan’s friends, Sami and Lindsay, whom I have gotten to know a bit from some of Megan’s past parties and social media. I was glad to see them and branch out a little!

Megan and me! I’m pretty sure this was only the first hour of the party and you can see it in my eyes, you guys. Lightweight.

Everyone was really excited that I remembered the existence of .5 selfies.

:D Not me being a fucking pest.

They made me take a real one, and then also made me Facetime our work pal Vicki in Chicago and she actually answered! I would never answer a Facetime from me. Honestly.

Apparently, Vicki yelled at Nate for not Facetiming her from Chingumas, so this was heavy on his mind and he didn’t want to get reprimanded two weeks in a row.

Here’s Megan announcing the winners! Mary’s espresso martini came in first. It was so good. Everything was so good. Henry was in charge of fetching me samples and he claims that he got me one of everything but who can be sure. (Megan had, like, double shot glasses on hand for the sampling.)

HENRY MADE A FRIEND. Later in the night, I was outside having A DEEP CONVO with my new friend Joanna (you will meet her here soon, hold on, I’m out of order) and Henry’s new friend was also out there smoking. I was shivering because I didn’t have a coat on so he was like, “OMG here” and gave me his flannel. Then a few minutes later, some woman came out to get a beer and she goes, “I just wanted to see who was wearing my husband’s shirt.”

!!!!

I told Henry this later and he was like, “Good job, idiot.”

LOL I DON’T REMEMBER TAKING THIS.

ALSO ERIC SAID THAT HE WOULD HAVE VOTED FOR HENRY’S COOKIES ABOVE ANY OF THE COCKTAILS.

BE REAL.

LOL OK here is my new friend Joanna, who came in a tornado, acting like we already knew each other and I was just buzzed enough that I was like, “OK I WILL PLAY ALONG” while everyone else was like, “Oh no.”

You guys, it turns out that Joanna and I actually grew up on the same street in South Park!!! I didn’t realize that until the next day when I texted my childhood bff and said, “Hey I met this girl who graduated a few years after you at SPHS, do you know her” and she was like, “Um yeah, she lived on our street! Her parents still live there!” So I texted Joanna and told her this and she was like OMG WHAT and it’s like fate, you guys, even though we will probably try to hang out at some point and realize that the magic of being manic together at Megan’s cocktail contest thing does not transfer to real life scenarios, like having coffee or eating ravioli, I don’t fucking know.

This was shortly after Joanna and I met. She was sad because no one was eating her storebought cupcakes and I said, “Oh here, I’ll have one” and as I picked up the container, I said, “Oh look! One is gone! Someone ate one!”

“Yeah,” Joanna slurred. “MY UBER DRIVER!”

And then you guys, you guys, my god, she started laughing so hard that her voice got caught and then she was crying from the strain of it all and I was just there for the ride, laughing along with her, but she kept thanking me for making her laugh the hardest she had all year, I mean, she even texted me when she got home that night to tell me again, and also the next day. I…didn’t do anything though?! LOL!

Lauren got this picture AND video of the scene:

Us with Mary, whose cocktail placed first and is an incredible singer! She has a Christmas album on Spotify and sang for Joanna and me on Megan’s backporch! She has recently gotten back into acting and I want to go to one of her shows.

The Law Firm Connection.

Anyway, that was a REALLY great night and I didn’t realize how much I needed to let out steam. I had fun at my party too but….I was fucking stressed and distracted. I didn’t even really drink that much at my own party! Which is probably for the best. But yeah, I really needed this night of social butterflying, and it was fun to me the Old-Real Me again for a few hours, not giving a shit if I’m making an ass out of myself (and I assure you that I was, lol).

The last thing on our Tallinn agenda was leaving Old Town and figuring out what bus to get on to take us to some random city park that had some kiddy rides, including a coaster.

Allegedly.

When you’re a coaster thoosie, and you go out of your way to ride some janky one-off coaster, usually located in a family entertainment center or, you know, a zoo, it’s called “getting a plus one.”

Don’t say I never teach you a thing or three!

Anyway, Chooch didn’t find out that Tallinn had this baby coaster until we were already on the trip and he was looking at some coaster directory. I had been hounding Chooch to give me some things that he wanted to do so it wasn’t all me me me me because that’s what I hear about ALL THE TIME post-trips, how we only did what ERIN wanted to do and you know what? Become a fucking Queen like me and then you as well can do everything you want to do! UGH! GOD!!!

I guess figuring out the bus was OK. We bought bus passes from a store, I think? And we JUST made the bus that we needed to catch. Chooch was responsible for figuring out this portion of the day. I was just along for the ride, literally. Sometimes I think about how dependent I am on him and Henry and I realize that holy shit, could I even survive on my own? I would be crying in my hotel room the entire time and that’s assuming I was even able to catch my flight in the first place.

According to the time stamps on photos, we were on the bus at 6:47pm and Chooch’s ass was securely in the seat of this dumb coaster at 7:08pm.

The ride operator was like, “Wow, you sure about this pal?” I mean, not in so many words.

He wanted this to be his senior picture.

But yeah, the rest of the “park” was um, yeah. It just…was. Basically an extremely run-down carnival that you might see in a church parking lot, after it’s been left to rust and rot for a handful of years. But, he got that credit!

The actual city park it was in was very pretty though. Kadrioru Park, in case you want to go there and also scoop up that +1. I mean, this might be a credit that only Chooch (and one other guy, but only because Chooch gave him the heads up the next day) got out of everyone on our trip?? This park was apparently established by Peter the Great!

I thought it was really beautiful, worth going out of our way for that damn credit.

We stopped at a convenience store before embarking on our journey back to the ferry terminal (we opted to walk because it wasn’t too far / we had time to kill / walking is the best way to see a new city) and got some popsicles and candy. I wish I could go back in time and buy more bags of the candy I chose because it was so fucking good. Of course I can’t remember what the fuck it was, either.

These fucking dolls.

I asked Henry what he liked about Tallinn and he said, “I liked the Dave Matthews bar.”

Wow, Dave Matthews, really? Mm.

Then I asked him if he’d go back (after I ridiculed him saying Dave Matthews instead of Depeche Mode) and he said, “Yeah” with no hesitation so that’s cool I guess because I never can tell if he’s actually having fun when we’re on vacation, lol.

The worst part of the day honestly was the ferry ride back. It was SO LATE at that point (I think our ferry left sometime after 10PM and it was well after midnight when we got back to Helsinki, and definitely after 1AM by the time we took a bus and street car back to our room. REALLY wish we had just stayed overnight in Tallinn! But, we had to get an early start the next day, our last full day, because we were doing a day trip to Tampere. But, you know, more on that later.

Well, I’ll end this Estonian

chapter with a video compilation from the day (one of the clips is sideways and I cannot fucking fix it no matter what, even though it’s not saved like that in my phone, and I only recorded that for the guys singing/yelling so I guess it doesn’t even really matter, and also LOL that those guys have gotten off the ferry with cases of alcohol, as I mentioned is a thing in my last post!

One of the non-negotiable items on my vacation itinerary wish list was to dine at Old Hansa, which is a medieval-themed restaurants serving only what would have been found in people’s pantries back in the day. I knew going into this that it is a TOTAL TOURISTY thing to do but I cared not. I wanted to eat here. I mean, when in Tallinn, right?

Oh, and the other deciding factor was that they have a vegetarian and vegan section on the menu! We made reservations a few mths in advance and it turns out, totally not needed. Maybe because it was a Thursday at 4pm, I dunno, but the inside seating of the restaurant was almost completely empty. There were a good bit of people sitting outside, but I wanted the candlelit experience of the indoors!

I wish I had gotten a photo of our waiter but he was wonderful, never strayed from his medieval fief (?) character, and steered me clear of what I was originally going to order because it was “hit or miss” with a “strong taste” that “some diners didn’t care for.”

I appreciated him for this.

Chooch and his non-alcoholic beer which of course didn’t like.

Medieval bathroom selfie.

Oven-baked herb and juniper cheese. Um, just looking at this picture has activated my saliva glands, I am gleeking like no one’s business over here. The taste memory of this appetizer is haunting my tongue like a ghost wearing a flavor sheet. FML, I want to go back to this moment.

I ended up getting the Five Tastes of Vegetarian Origin: Crusader’s Lentils, Ginger Rutabaga, Saffron Spelt,
Forest Mushroom Sauce, Rickard’s Cheese Pasties with Garlic and Herbs. It was DELICIOUS. Like, lick-the-plate-clean levels of delicioso.

Chooch got the Faraway Merchant’s Lentil Dish: Spicy Lentils and Saffron Spelt with plentiful Greens and Crispy Lentil Bread. Which he of course did not like so Henry and I ravaged his refuse.

Henry got salmon or something, he can’t remember.

Yes, this was expensive, definitely the most expensive meal of the whole trip. But to me, it was worth it for the experience and the ambiance, and I’m sorry but everything on my plate was excelsior and unlike anything I have ever eaten before. After all the cinnamon rolls and licorice, my body was praising me for giving it vegetables.

(Fun fact: There are no potatoes to be found on the menu because potatoes weren’t available back then!)

Then we went to the shoppe so I could so a schnapps tasting but Henry the Fucker took the cup and drank half of it!! I was so fucking offended. Literally almost started a fight with him over it but whatever.

I’ll tell you what, even just the half-shot that my Big Strong Keeper Man permitted me to have did wonders for my sinuses! I was like a brand new woman for about 10 minutes but then I got all clogged up again so I think the lesson learned here is that hourly shots of schnapps need to be tossed back.

Anyway, I bought a bottle for Margie, because I knew she would appreciate souvenir liquor. I gave it to her in the office too and she was like, “SHOULD WE DRINK THIS NOW??” Um, yes??

(We didn’t.)

:(

Then we went to Europe’s oldest, continually operating pharmacy which also has a small, free museum area.

This is one of my favorite photos that I took while in Tallinn, in case you cared. (WHY DON’T YOU CARE??)

(WHY DOESN’T CHOOCH CARE??)

Then we had a tony bit of time to kill before the Depeche Mode Bar opened so we just strolled around.

Fuck Putin.

Eat shit, Putin.

Then, Depeche Mode Bar! Next up: Chooch’s stupid Tallinn coaster credit.

I’m telling you – one day in Tallinn just wasn’t enough. It was BARELY even enough to enjoy all that Old Town alone has to offer. I hope we make it back someday because I really loved it there a lot. Great people, great vibes, so much history and beauty.

You guys didn’t see this coming, I bet, but here is a post with more Tallinn stuff. Even though I was dragging, it was such a – DARE I SAY – epic day. That city’s got some magical, gritty vibes man. Also, some Russian vibes as well, unsurprisingly.

We quite honestly spent the entire time walking around, shopping, looking for the oldest working pharmacy in the world, having allergy attacks in antique shops while Chooch suddenly decided he wanted to collect war memorabilia??

My only regret, other than being sick, is not having more than a day to spend here. I really wanted to go into some museums, explore outside of Old Town, eat more meals. I wanted to do so much. Our original plan was to spend the night there but our itinerary changed so many times, I can’t remember why we opted to just do a day trip. Some stupid travel vlogger probably told me that’s all we needed. Wrong.

We had split up from Chooch at some point, I can’t remember why, and when we were trying to tell him where we were, I sent him this picture of a family with dog and his response was to send it back to me from a different angle because he apparently was spying on us like a little fucking creep.

I googled “famous people from Estonia” because I thought that would be a fun fact to share since I am trying (and failing) to be a BLOG WORTH READING, A SAFE SPACE TO LEARN SHIT, but I don’t recognize any single name so I am not sharing. You can google it yourself. Look, there I go, back to being a bully blogger.

We walked up a hill to the Kohtuotsa viewing platform, which I highly recommend if you are up for the slight exertion. I thought it would be a madhouse up there, but it surprisingly wasn’t crowded at all.

Probably Steven Seagull but we’ll just pretend.

He sure was friendly!

I could have leaned against that wall for an hour, just being a lookie-loo.

Virgin’s Tower.

Literally everywhere we turned: photo op. This town is majestic. I can’t believe we were there.

I saw some other people taking a picture here so then I had to take one of Chooch and he was like UGH GREAT THANKS PEOPLE.

OMG, this sign cracked me up. My friend Amber (AG1 from the Law Firm, if you’re a long time reader) calls her mom “pood” and when I saw this sign, I had to send it to her. Apparently, “pood” just means “shop” over there!

Next, we popped into Cafe Lummus for a quick break aka for me to have an allergy attack in the privacy of a bathroom.

This bathroom was so nice. I loved the aesthetic of this cafe AND the barista was so friendly.

Some random facts about Tallinn that I remember without googling: it is allegedly marzipan-happy but I feel like I didn’t see that much of it, amber jewelry stores are on every street, they love Schnapps. If you ask my one co-worker who used to live in Finland, he will tell you that it is also a tourist trap but don’t listen to him. I didn’t, and I’m glad because Tallinn (Old Town at least!) was one of the best days of our trip even though I was sick!

THIS BLUE BUILDING!!

I had been eying up this cute little shop of local artisan wares called OmaAsi. Of course, as soon as I walked in it was empty but within one minute, 10 pushy women tourists arrived and the twinge in my throat started to flare with a vengeance. I hurried up and picked a pair of earrings for Megan (I think the brand was Kirju??) and a ring by Inga Koppel for myself, shoved them at Henry and then ran outside to breathe in the fresh air.

Anyway, it was almost time for our dinner reservation at this point so that will be the next post. I know you can hardly wait.

Hello there is no point to this blog post.

This week is off to a weird start. I’m glad it’s a short one and I’m excited to spend time with my family during this long weekend.  It randomly (I mean, it felt like it to me because I wasn’t FOLLOWING THE WEATHER) started snowing today and I’ll tell you, when the house is decorated for Christmas and marginally clean, it definitely makes me hate snow a little less and I allow myself to lean into the coziness. I just want the theme of the long Christmas weekend to be FUCKIN’ COZY.

I was thinking earlier about how this time of year seems extra weird and disorienting because we didn’t go away during Thanksgiving weekend which is something that I really look forward to so I declared that we should just always go to Dollywood for that weekend, it can be a tradition. Henry was like THATS FINE but then Chooch came home and when I asked him he first said yes but then he backtracked and said, “wait I’ll be 18 next year I’m not going to Dollywood with you” WOWOWOWOWOW. Henry called it. :(

And now, apropos of nothing, a grilled cheese close-up:

I ate this grilled cheese at Frank & Shirley’s with Bill, Jessi, and Chooch and also taught Jessi the correct way to eat it: dunked into a pool of Ketchup. It is the only way!

Also, I got my grilled cheese on rye, which inspired Bill to change the bread on his sandwich also to rye and you know, what can I say? I’m just a walking, talking sack of peer pressure.

Anyway, I almost didn’t get the grilled cheese because this was several hours before Chingumas and Henry was supposed to be dishing out some mini grilled kimcheeses for the party people but THEN HE FORGOT TO MAKE THEM so I guess it’s a good thing that I ordered grilled cheese after all. Idiot.

This is Penelope’s favorite corner. She has a bunch of COZY beds under the church pew and that is where you can find her most of the day. Look at her, she’s like, “let me show you allllll around my houssssse.”

I’ve been awake since around 4:30am because Idiot Henry’s alarm woke me up because he’s so inconsiderate and then I started to fall back asleep around 5am but then Chooch woke up and started getting ready for school and then slammed the front door repeatedly because he kept leaving and coming back?! I have no idea what is going on anymore, but he apparently has been leaving extra early for school because he “feels like it” and when he leaves early, he can take the T instead of the bus, so he gets to Oakland super early, eats breakfast at Dunkin’ and then goes to Pitt Towers and sleeps on a couch.

Are we sure he’s not already in college? It feels like he might be in college.

Well, on that note, I’m stupid tired and have nothing else to say. Time for me to crash.

.

Way back in September, we were on our way to Chicago for Riot Fest when I randomly started talking about whether or not we’d have a Christmas party that year. I am always on the fence with this. I love having parties, I really do, but I always get really stressed out and sometimes end up not even enjoying it. Plus, I just don’t really care about Xmas that much. I started thinking about how people have Friendsgiving but I also kind of think that’s corny and giving A Beautiful Mess, so I definitely wanted to make up my own holiday.

It got me thinking, what’s the Korean word for “friend”?

Chingu.

And I would still want to have the party in December.

So…Chingumas. Boom. Done.

I googled this, in English and Korean, and nothing comes up so I think I might have literally invented it!? I excitedly texted Chooch from the car and he of course didn’t respond so I had to follow up hours later:

UGHUGHUGH.

Then the next day, we met my friend Vicki who works in the law firm’s Chicago office for breakfast and before we even sat all the way down, I blurted out, “VICKI I HAVE TO TELL YOU SOMETHING THAT NO ONE FROM OUR GROUP KNOWS YET” to which she responded with a pallid-faced, “OMG what?”

“I think I invented a new holiday!” I cried. She slapped a hand against her chest and sighed, “Oh, Erin!” I guess she thought I was going to tell her I was quitting or something.

We hit up H-Mart before leaving Chicago the next day so that we could stock up on all the Korean alcohol, boiii, since Pgh sucks in that regard (you can get soju at some liquor stores but I have not seen a great selection of flavors nor have I seen makgeolli which is my fave Korean sul).

And then I proceeded to embark on a willy-nilly, haphazard invitation spree. Jessica, the only thing I miss about Facebook, THE ONLY THING, is the ability to create a FB event, add everyone I want, and then easily keep track of the RSVP list, post updates, delegate food-bringing, etc. Now, I am inviting people on Instagram. Via text. Over Jabber at work. On It-Will-Always-Be-Twitter. And then I promptly cannot remember who I invited and who I didn’t invite. So the week before the party is inevitably spent terrorizing people, asking, “PLEASE REMIND ME, ARE YOU COMING TO CHINGUMAS?” and then they reply with, “PLEASE REMIND ME, WHEN IS IT?” and it’s a hot mess. And then I always forget to invite people because I’m in my early onset dementia era, I think. Or I need to start keeping an actual planner like people did in the 70s or whatever.

Anyway, Chingumas was last Saturday the 9th and guess what?? My great friends Bill & Jessi came all the way from Michigan on Friday to spend the First Weekend of Chingumas with us! I had every intent of decorating early, doing food prep early, etc etc so that on Saturday, we could relax a little and spend time with them.

Did that happen? FUCK NO. We were panic-everything’ing the whole fucking day. It was a dumpster fire. Henry was so behind on food-making, I wasn’t still decorating when people were beginning to arrive, my heart rate was rabbit-on-the-run levels of Next Stop: Heart Attack Land.

I mean, look Linda, listen: it was fine! It really was fine. Even though people were arriving while I was roaming around aimlessly, muttering over and over, “Wait, what was I doing? Why did I come in here?” and then Chooch had to help me cut out my idol food labels because I don’t have eight hands and Henry was still preparing food so the kitchen was a shit house and UGH. He had to give me a quiet pep talk as I was contemplating drowning myself in the kitchen sink.

Megan’s Famous Cheeseball: Korea Edition! It had gochujang in it, which was the secondary theme of the party – so much food had gochujang in it and I was happy because this is one of my favorite things ever! (It’s Korean red pepper paste, in case you were wondering, and it is fucking spicy and perfect.)

But you know what, he was right. It was fine. I was OK. It was OK. The food got done (although he forgot that he was supposed to make mini grilled kimcheese so that’s great, thanks). People were eating and drinking and laughing and my work friends were mingling with my non-work friends and my friend Cara that I have known since Kindergarten but rarely see showed up with a Seoul Box for me and she seemed to be OK being thrown to the wolves aka my other friends, and Bill and Jessi’s presence kept me calm, and Chooch had four of his friends over and they were like “This is good food” and everyone was calling the kimbap “sushi” even though I had a cut-out of Sana from Twice announcing that it was kimbap but you know what, this was just the first Chingumas. Baby steps.

One of my favorite parts was when Glenn and Amanda arrived and some of my non-work friends were like, “Yes, we know Glenn” and Glenn was like, “No…I don’t think we’ve met” and then they realize, “Oh shit we know him from Erin’s blog” or whatever, and thank god that he is OK with that HAHA. I mean, is he though? Eh. Probably.

Thank god you can’t see the sink in this shot because it was FULL. The perils of not having a dishwasher.

I feel like I spent the first 30 minutes walking around with an industrial roll of tape, and then at one point asking, “Why am I holding this?” You can see it laying on that white stool back there. I set it down and then forgot about it for hours until I found it later laying on the hand chair and then finally putting it away.

I guess I’m including all of this because I am marginally concerned about my brain health and want to have this on record. Maybe I’m just tired. Maybe I should start taking naps?

Maybe I should also include the guest list before I start forgetting names and faces as well:

• Bill & Jessi
• Amanda & Glenn
• Janna
• Cara
• Megan
• Sami
• Lori
• Sandy
• Nate & April
• Wendi & Ben
• Margie
• Shawn & Jess
• Chris & Monica
• Corey
• Lauren

Chooch’s Crew:

• Ben
• Daniel x 2 (aka The Daniels)
• Zakk

We made tiramisu and I know you’re asking right, “Why would you make a traditional Italian dessert for a party celebrating Korean culture?” and I will tell you why: one of the first things we realized on our first trip to Korea was that HOLY SHIT, they love tiramisu in that country! You could go into any cafe and expect to see some type of tiramisu in the dessert case. Tiramisu almonds.

Ya gotta just take my word for it, OK? Tiramisu is ubiquitous over there and we love that.

In the beginning of the party, I was panicking that I wasn’t going to get enough pictures which has been a problem in the past, so I literally just ran around in photo attack mode which my GUESTS FUCKING LOVED, I WILL TELL YOU THAT MUCH especially when I posted some of these on Instagram to their great “I wasn’t ready!” chagrin. Corey and Chris look like I dragged them in my house off the street and tossed them back there, which to be fair is kind of the strategy I had for accumulating party guests back in my early 20s. I mean, I have kind of changed my ways and I, you know, play by the book these days, sort of.

You can tell I was frantically taking these and people were like, “AREN’T THESE BLURRY??”

“No!” I yelled over my shoulder, moving on to my next target. Flash forward to the next morning, oh man, a lot of these photos are blurry!

I was going to only play kpop but I feel like people wouldn’t have been able to handle ALL KPOP ALL THE TIME so I used last year’s Xmas Party playlist which seemed to be ok for everyone.

LOL MARGIE and her shot glass of soju lol.

Tiramisu!

Henry also made a large platter of tteokbokki and the other sub-theme of the night was, “This is spicy but I like it!”

Still on my photo-attack tip.

Here’s Henry finally getting a chance to explain the nitty-gritty electrical deets behind his Seoul Subway sign. You can’t see her, but Margie was listening intently so that she can make something similar for our next department meeting. So when Sue says, “Margie, can you pull up the numbers?” Margie can share her screen to show her gigantic light-up sign of our new business intake monthly stats.

I don’t know what was going on here but when I reminded people of the hashtags that I wanted them to use on Instagram, Nate seemed very annoyed so I left the Back Porch Club alone after that.

Megan and Janna used to live on the same street but then Megan moved because she didn’t want to live on the same street as someone who can’t pick Haechan out of a crowd of 9!!!!

My favorite part of the night was finally getting people to try makgeolli and I’d say it was a hit! Hope they didn’t like it too much since it is so fucking hard to find around here.

OK, I have been writing this for way too long.

Wendi and Ben! We almost had two Wendi/ys here but Wendy-with-a-Y was sick :(

Lori and Sandy and the Rush Audit Light!

Cara! We almost had two Cara/Karas but Kara-with-a-K was sick :(

Chronica!!

Nate and April!

Jessi and Bill!!

Margie and Lauren!

Herbert and Megan!

Chooch and Wonka talking about Computer Science thangs. Chooch became the man of the hour after his friends left and he was available to be verbally accosted by all of the adults wanting to drill him on his college plans. I tried to ask him a question later that night after everyone left and he said, “I’m all out of talks. Come back another day.”

Wow.

Megan and me! Also, my gochujang cookie looks like it has Mary or Jesus on it!?

Jess and Wonka!

Corey!

Freaking precious.

I think this one needs framed???

Glenn and Amanda!

I dunno, I think it was fun! It seemed like everyone else did too so I guess we will try it again next year with maybe more advanced Korean culture components. Photo cards, maybe?? An NCT member line-up match game?? Hangul crash course?? Korean drinking games?!

We saw this almost immediately after leaving the ferry dock thing and I was obsessed. 

Admittedly, Estonia was not really on my radar – I mean, I knew that it existed, but it wasn’t on my short list of must-see locales. However, when I was investigating Helsinkithings, I accidentally learned that not only is it cheap and easy to make a day trip out of Tallinn, Estonia, but it’s also a very popular weekend destination for people in Finland! The one thing I kept seeing is that liquor is a lot cheaper in Estonio, so people from Finland will do day trips there to stock up, but….is it still worth it even after adding in the cost of the ferry?! I mean, the round trip ferry fare was very reasonable, but still…? Anyone from Finland reading that who can explain? Lol.

My first impression of Tallinn though was CONSTRUCTION. So, pretty much like being home in Pittsburgh. Aw. We knew that Old Town was supposed to be easily accessible by foot but the construction definitely added a bit of chaos. We followed another family pretty much the whole way until they veered off and Henry was sure he knew the way by then, but does he ever?

Yo, I’m going to do something that I should always be doing but never do and that is drop some informational facts about this place.

Such as: Tallinn is the capital of Estonia.

*ooh*

*ahh*

I love the juxtaposition between gritty graffiti and historical alleyway here.

We hadn’t even been off the ferry for a full hour yet and Chooch was already over me requesting photos. I was just really excited! I even brought “the good” camera so that I could get some senior portraits of him there!

Tallinn’s Old Town, with its epic medieval architecture, is a UNESCO World Heritage site.

You can tour the medieval city walls – and we did! Just not right when we arrived because it wasn’t open yet. FYI.

I was loving Tallinn immediately, even though I’m sure there was a lot of bickering with Henry since he nearly shat on the whole day with the EARLY DEPARTURE HOME time and then being a map idiot.

I was looking forward to this so much! It really delivered. Old Town was gorgeous, like being in a fairy tale.

And it was so good being there as early as we were because we were able to grab some great Instagram shots without flocks of tourists in the background. Because, you know, getting those shots for the ‘gram is the most important part of traveling….right? J/K I’m not that annoying (shut up) but it was still a bonus!

We had dinner reservations at 4pm (Old People Dining Time but I made the reservations months ago and wasn’t sure how long we were going to be there so I was trying to play it safe, god!), so we decided to get a light brunch type of situation.  We chose a cafe called Must Puudel.

Chooch was unreasonably mad because after he led us to a table inside, I said that I would prefer to sit outside because being indoors was making my throat tickle and then I would start coughing and no one wants that, OK. No one.

Dude. I got oatmeal with CLOUDBERRIES. The server actually tried to talk me out of it because, “….they have….unique taste.” But I knew that cloudberries were popular in that region (Finland and Sweden too I think?) so I wanted it. And guess what? I LIKED IT. It reminded me a bit of ground cherries in that they had a very mild sweetness with a tiny aftertaste of tomato? I’m not a big tomato fan unless it’s a fresh slice on a sandwich or in a grilled cheese but this was good. I liked it.

I don’t know what Those People got.

Town Hall Square. This is where the Christmas market is later in the year (LIKE NOW BECAUSE THAT IS HOW LONG IT HAS TAKEN ME TO WRITE THIS – I WAS HERE IN AUGUST FOR FUCK’S SAKE).

Did you know that Tallinn was the first city in Europe to put up a Christmas Tree in its city square?? It’s true, and it dates all the way back to 1441. I’m shook.

Anyway, after we ate, it was time to do the city wall / Hellemann Tower tour thingie! Apparently, the building itself was completed in 1355, 1410 for the tower, but it has burned repeatedly through the years and was most recently rebuilt in 2010 and reopened to the public.

It was actually harrowing to climb parts of it because there was no rhyme or reason to the steps and they were dangerously steep. I thought for sure, since I hadn’t fallen off the funhouse steps in Stockholm, that this is where I was undoubtedly going to bite it. But surprisingly, I made it up AND down without any bruises but I think I did scrape my hand off one of the walls at one point if I remember correctly.

Oh man. I could have stood there all day looking at the rooftops.

Also I would like to point out that I kept hounding Henry to take money out because I wanted to see what it looked like and he was all THEY DON’T LIKE DEALING WITH CASH I READ ABOUT IT. EVERYTHING SAYS TO JUST USE CARD and I was like, “mm ok” but then AS SOON as we walked into the tower, the man selling tickets was like, “HAHA YOU THOUGHT. CASH ONLY FOOLS” so then Chooch and I berated Henry the entire time he walked around looking for a bank or ATM. Henry can be so terrible to travel with sometimes, you guys. Leave Henry at home if you plan on visiting Tallinn. He will just hold you back and ensure that you won’t have enough time to do everything you wanted to do.

This was in St. Catherine’s Passage, where you kind find a bunch of little galleries and local artisans.

I knew this place existed from various travel videos that I had watched but I feel like if we were intentionally looking for it, FORGET ABOUT IT. We just stumbled upon by accident and I quickly realized what it was and yelled, “THIS IS WHERE THE GLASS SHOP IS!” I went inside and immediately bought cool handmade glasses for Janna and myself while Henry muttered to himself about how everything I was buying during this trip was glass.

Then we lost Chooch for a little bit. I think he was playing Pokemon Go. Henry didn’t seem too concerned.

We both had to pee really bad so we found another cafe and decided to get A SUNDAE while we were there because that’s obligatory when you’re on vacation. Sundaes for no reason, at any time of the day.

Pierre Chocolaterie Cafe!

The bathroom was soooo tiny and it was RIGHT next to the counter making it extremely awkward. Anyway, I thought the mirror was cool and I wanted to take a bathroom selfie because I’m a grown ass woman and if I want to TAKE A BATHROOM SELFIE I WILL DAMN WELL TAKE A BATHROOM SELFIE. However, as I started to take it, someone began to vigorously tug on the door knob which made me panic so I snapped it and then left only to come face to face with WAS LOST BUT NOW IS FOUND Chooch. What a fucking pest. He literally was born to troll me, I think.

I want to go back in time and get one of each.

We sat outside so I wouldn’t cough my face out, especially being surrounded by all that vintage fabric.

YEAH BOY. Henry and I shared the Dame Blanche, which was vanilla ice cream, Grand Marnier, fresh raspberry jam, and whipped cream. I wish I had just gotten my own because this was really delightful, a nice change from the standard hot fudge sundae that I would generally default to.

I made Chooch write a postcard to his Grandma Judy while we were sitting here and he was so pissed about it. He hates writing postcards which is why I, his own damn mother, didn’t get a postcard from him when he was in Mexico. I thought FOR SURE he would send one. No. Not even for my birthday.

I could have sat here all damn day.

But, we had shopping, walking, and looking to do before our dinner! MORE LATER.  I think Tallinn is going to be a whole damn series, I’m sorry. It was cool there and I took a lot of pictures, sue me.

Hi, here I am, ’bout to be obnoxious and annoying about my NCT Dream obsession, what else is new, Herman? This was one of my favorite songs on the last Dream album but they never did any live stages of it at the music shows. So when I saw that this a part of their MMA 2023 performance, I could have passed out. I mean, I was screaming hard enough to actually pass out so it’s a wonder I didn’t.

I have watched this so many times since then, and JESUS CHRIST.

Tonight is a “relax and catch up on award show performances” kind of night. This used to be my favorite time of the year back when BIGBANG was still around because their award show stages were L E G E N D A R Y and it just hasn’t really been the same since. Sometimes I still go back and watch the old performances and I just can’t get over how next level they were, you guys. Unparalleled. Timeless. Charismatic. Straight fucking fire.

OK I’m going to go and place my kpop dinosaur self in a corner and pout now.

Let’s free-form the shit of this thing.

Last Wednesday night, Henry and I went to see the NCT Nation concert movie in Robinson.

This time, there were way more people and even another “kpop husband” was in the crowd.  So, NCT Nation was the whole entire NCT conglomerate doing one huge concert together, all of the sub-groups, etc. They did several shows in Korea and Japan and fuck, do I wish I could have attended one of those.

Did I cry during this? Pfft, you know it, Miss Betty. The way NCT fills my heart after a long day of work and general life dread…it’s like when you take a shot of Robitussin (Janna’s #1 subject) and you can feel it heating up as it cruises through your body. That’s how NCT makes me feel. Like they are hugging me from the inside.

….that….OK that’s a weird visual.

Anyway, this wasn’t part of the movie, but I have watched this video from their concert so many times and it never stops giving me goosebumps.

All I want Janna to get me for Christmas is proof that she has learned all 20 of their names lol. (Only 19 were at these concerts because Taeil was/is recovering from surgery after a motorcycle accident.)

Bill and Jessi were in town for my party this weekend and thank god because I was so fucking stressed out. I don’t know why. Maybe it was all of the other stress that I kept trying to push out of the way, finally found a way back to the forefront and woo boy was I was mess. But having them here helped because they are two of my favorite people in the world and it’s been a MINUTE since they were last in Pgh!

Late Saturday afternoon, we left Henry at home cooking and went to Frank & Shirley’s for a late lunch after Chooch came home from his game design class at Pitt. It was SO FUCKING nice to sit still, eat a grilled cheese, bullshit, and watch Jessi follow my example of dunking the grilled cheese in a puddle of Ketchup and realize that, “OK yeah that’s good.”

It’s the only way I’ve eaten grilled cheese since I was a wee lass!

And I told them about how I used to LOVE going there in high school because there was A CIGARETTE MACHINE and wow, that’s something that I hadn’t thought about in forever, putting tons of quarters in those machines and then setting up a display on the table of all the different brands I scored. I remember getting a pack of Pall Malls and one of my guy friends being like JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, ERIN.

I have a picture of my cigarette collection somewhere. Maybe one day I will look for it and then post it here and you guys can be like, “Wow. You were so edgy. Brag some more about your dirty habit, Yellow Fingers.”

Here I am stalking Chooch at work last Thursday night. Turns out this was also the same night that the dumbass lost his wallet for approx. the 10th time in the last three years only this time, sadly it’s a goner for good. His luck hath run dry. Also, he had a tense conversation with a total BITCH of a middle aged broad with bleached hair looking like Real Housewives of Pgh reject because the sign on the Chipotle window said they’re open until 11 but that night they closed at 9. Like Chooch, a 17yo, has anything to do with that. He kept trying to walk around while her mouth was steady running.  Jesus Christ lady. Go look at the Ann Taylor website and calm down.

Drew, noticing that the Christmas decorations are back.

In other news, I have watched Queen Charlotte which I almost didn’t watch at all because she was one of my least faves from the Bridgerton series but then I got desperate for something to watch while walking in place (no, you have issues) and holy smutty fuck, no one told me that this was going to rip my stupid fucking heart out?? I don’t know if I’m just really at such a low point emotionally or if this really was that deeply sad, but I was full-body SOBBING. I can’t remember the last time I was so touched by an on-screen (and I guess moderately IRL depending on how historically accurate this was) romance/relationship. Jesus, I felt that, for Charlotte and George, and also Brimsley and Reynolds. I even started spontaneously sobbing in the shower about it.

At one point, Henry was sitting next to me and I was trying so hard to hold back my tears that I started choking and gagging, which made it worse and Henry was like, “OK as if I didn’t know you were crying.”

Damn, that hurt. A lot.

I also watched School Spirits which also felt like I was cutting, but on my psyche and not my skin?? I thought I had signed on for some light high school television but no, I got fully invested in every character and cried my contacts cloudy during THAT one too!!

Well, I’m going to go now. Coaster Kev from our trip (Chooch’s favorite of the 4 Kevins, in case you were wondering) just posted his Liseberg video and I would like to curl up under my blanket, maybe sip from kombucha, and relive the trip that I still haven’t finished writing about. #priorities

P.S. NCT DREAM CASUALLY MENTIONED IN AN INTERVIEW TO SOME AMERICAN MEDIA OUTLET LAST NIGHT THAT THEY PLAN ON TOURING AGAIN NEXT YEAR SO LORD HELP ME.

P.P.S. I have slowly been admitting to those around me that when I saw NCT Dream last April, it made me more emotional than when I saw the Cure those two times over the summer. I said what I said. That doesn’t mean The Cure has been dethroned!! But I think when I used to get emotional over the Cure, it was for different reasons. I was SO FULLY DEPRESSED (and suicidal, no use in hiding it) when I was REALLY getting into the Cure, so for a long time, when I would see them in concert, it felt like opening old wounds, most actually had never even started to close at all. So I would OF COURSE feel gutted and next-level emotional. But I am so far-removed from those years, from that dark part of my life, that I was eventually able to get to the point where I can listen to the Cure without laying in the fetal position on the floor with a bottle of Manischevitz.

But with NCT Dream, it’s different. It’s new. It feels more personal, like I know them, I care for them so much, I’m hugely protective and proud of them. So when I saw them last April, here for their first US tour, I was like out of my mind delulu. Like hysterical. And to this day, if I think about it, I start to cry because I feel so grateful to have been able to go and support them in person and see them on a stage so close up and watch them sing and dance to my favorite songs that have brightened my days for the last several years. It’s a different kind of emotional. I love being a Czennie <3