l

Corey and I were stressing over finding a good place to eat post-Mattress Factory when we first made plans but then Chooch came home from college and was like, “I want to go to Cafe Moulin. One of my friends recommended it.”

Turns out the FRIEND is Sophia, who probably is legit just a friend but I had to be a total mom about it and start grilling him for info. She’s part of his friend group in Drexel (HER ROOMMATE IS FROM ROMANIA!) and is from Grand Rapids but her dad went to CMU so I guess they were visiting Pittsburgh at some point because of that, but I thought it was kind of funny that we were going somewhere based on a quasi-tourist’s suggestion.

Especially since it wasn’t really anywhere near the Mattress Factory and Chooch said he didn’t necessarily mean that he wanted to go there THAT DAY but once it was mentioned, Corey and I both had CREPES ON THE BRAIN.

Speaking of brain, we spent the whole drive to Shadyside rehashing the body outside of the Mattress Factory. We were all determined to continue having a good day but now there was this macabre fog hunkering down on us, you know? Add to that the fact that Corey had recently hit a deer with his car and when we got out of it in the parking garage, he pointed out some DEER FUR that was still stuck to it?!!? I wailed, “WHY WOULD YOU SHOW ME THAT??”

He re-emphasized the fact that the deer was actually fine BUT STILL?! Jesus!

Anyway, Cafe Moulin was packed but luckily we were able to get a table within about 10 minutes. It took us forever to order because Corey couldn’t decide between sweet and savory so finally Chooch had enough and tossed a coffee creamer onto the menu. It landed on the Dubai chocolate crepe so Chooch was like, “Congratulations, now let’s move on with our lives.”

I’m telling you, Chooch is the adult amongst us.

FALALALALALA-FUCK these crepes were things of beauty! Corey let us try his and I had ordering remorse BUT my crepe was also delicious and so was Chooch’s (Chooch and I split ours with each other because we couldn’t choose – we made the right decision).

Chooch had to cut mine for me LOLOLOL.

His was the spanakopita and mine was….I forget but it was basically a caprese and oh, did it sweetly butter my muffin.

(Tivoli! Mine was called the Tivoli!)

Other things to note from Cafe Moulin:

• Corey and I go to the same therapy place so we talked extensively about our mutual family issues which inspired me to ask Chooch if he was happy, was his childhood ok, does he think he will need therapy someday?? He said yes, yes, and no!
• There was a young single diner sitting at a table for two, reading TUESDAYS WITH MORRIE while slowly peckig away at a crepe and sipping coffee. No shade on her at all, in fact, I was admiring her because I’m not the type of person who is OK with solo dining, but it did make me chuckle because the book choice kind of sent it over the top for me and I started wondering if she has one of the decks of cards that give you a solo adventure to go on and the one she pulled that morning was “eat crepes alone in a Parisian cafe while reading a famous memoir.”
• Chooch super dramatically spilled his glass of water. Like, he spilled it and then somehow spilled it again when he tried to set the glass upright and water was everywhere, but mostly pooled in the crotch of his pants. Luckily, he was wearing black track pants that day, but it was still enough of a spill that one of the servers had to come over to assist with a thick boi stack of napkins.

Overall, solid 10/10. I don’t have crepes very often but these really seemed like god tier crepes, at least for Pgh anyway.

After this, we went  to Kawaii Gifts and I bought the BSS album!! Corey and Chooch were like, “Mmm. That’s cool.” Things have really changed because when I used to go here, they never had anything kpop-related! And now they have a fairly decent collection, I must say.

Then we went to Amazing Books and as soon as we walked in, Chooch stopped in his tracks.

“Is this….oh wow, it is!” he said, in a “HARK!” stance and looking up at the ceiling. Turns out they were playing the new MEN I TRUST. What the actual fuck, you guys. I will always relate this band to THE MAYBE-DEAD BODY.

Chooch said this was the song that was on in Corey’s car when we were waiting to pull out of the Mattress Factory parking lot and then…well, you know the rest. UNLESS YOU DON’T READ EVERY BLOG POST I WRITE AND IN THAT CASE…well, I probably wouldn’t either I were you.

Chooch went over to the counter and had a lengthy conversation with the two guys working there about the new album while I was pretending to peruse books and not constantly thinking of the lady and the blood and the way her body was slumped over the curb of a random street in the Northside, and Corey was looking at a rack of greeting cards made by local artists which, btw, is also what he was looking at in the Mattress Factory’s gift shop, SHOULD I SEND HIM THE LINK TO MY ETSY CARD SHOP AND REMIND HIM THAT I TOO MAKE GREETING CARDS.

One last stop before we left was the little independent toy store and the lady working there reminded us of Janna’s mom a little so then Corey and I started up again with our favorite memory of Janna being beaten by her mom behind a curtained window and that was fun but also my stomach was starting to hurt from the crepes and the general excitement of the day so now I will associate that toy store with pain. Chooch meanwhile touched every single item in that place and then ended up not wanting anything, not even the dumb things that Janna’s mom was demo’ing for him (“THIS BALL CAN BOUNCE UPWARD OF 10 STORIES!”) which is CRAZY because I was offering to buy him pretty much everything since I was so happy to have him home.

And then we came home, where I would go on to spend the next two weeks hyper-obsessing over THE LADY and driving Henry and Chooch crazy over it.

(The next day when we were at lunch, I asked Chooch if he told any of his friends and he said, “No, because maybe did it occur to you that I’m traumatized and don’t want to talk about it?” he said drily.

“OMG REALLY??” I cried, ready to consult my mental Mothering manual.

“No!” he said, going back to looking at his phone while eating his omelet. Wow.)

Corey, Chooch and I had such a wonderful time at the Mattress Factory while Chooch was home for spring break, but after spending around 2 hours there trying to understand what we were looking at, it was time to go to lunch!

This is something that seemed inconsequential at the time, but as we exited the building and made our way up the steps the parking lot, some people came running down the handicap ramp, screaming. It caught me off guard, but it did appear that were laughing and in good spirits, presumably having just made their way back from the annex building around the corner.

Right after, we got in Corey’s car. I was sitting in the backseat. Corey asked Chooch to recommend something to put on (thank god because it had been early 2000s Top 40 up until then, like Ja Rule-type shit lol). Chooch has really been into sad girl music lately and immediately suggested that Corey play Men I Trust.

As a somber song queued up, Chooch goes, “Not really the vibe, but…” because we were all so giddy. Well, Corey and I were. Chooch is the adult amongst the children. Meanwhile, Corey was unable to pull out of the parking lot because a box truck was blocking the one-way lane.

There were three men standing on the sidewalk to the left of the truck, trying to wave him along. The one who stands out the most vividly in my mind was a young mail man and I think because from a distance and with my bad eyes, he looked like Chooch’s friend Isai. Chooch said he remembers one of the guys was wearing a CCAC shirt, I dunno.

We didn’t think anything of this and, while we were hungry, we also didn’t have reservations or anything like that so we were pleasantly calm about having to wait to see what this truck driver was going to do. After several minutes (honestly, it was less than 4 minutes because the same Men I Trust song was still playing), the truck slowly began to roll forward so Corey swung his car out onto the road and we continued along at the same slow pace.

Slow enough for Chooch to look out of his passenger window and say, “Oh! I think that lady was hit.”

And then I made the fatal error of also looking and oh boy, if I could go back in time. Have you ever glanced at something quickly and felt a jolt, like you just took an ice plunge?  That happened to me here. Nothing about this made me think she was hit by a car. What I saw was an older woman with white/gray hair, crumpled over onto her side along the sidewalk, shoulders and up were hanging off the curb and laying on the road in between an empty space between two parked cars. She had a lot of blood on the side/top of her face.  It didn’t look possible that she could have been hit by a car on that street, definitely not the box truck. To me, there was something about the scene that screamed V I O L E N C E.

What was worse was that I looked directly into her eyes, which looked vacant and icy.

“I THINK SHE IS DEAD??!??!” I cried.

“WHAT???” Corey screamed hysterically. “SHOULD WE TURN AROUND????”

But we had just arrived at a stop sign in time to see a fleet of cops, sirens on, rushing toward us, so there was clearly no need for us to go back, call it in, etc.

This is the illustration I made while I was explaining the sitch to Megan at work. Look, I was rushed. It was almost 5:30 and neither of us need to be staying logged on a minute more than required.

But here is an updated version to illustrate that the placement of the body was likely blocked by the box truck, therefore the men directing the truck to move seemed calm because they likely didn’t know w maybe-dead body was splayed out across the street, and that would also explain why the people who were coming into the Mattress Factory from the Annex seemed in good spirits – if that truck hadn’t been idling there, they probably would have seen the lady and would actually have been screaming as they ran past us as I originally  thought. (Corey and Chooch quickly shot down my second-questioning if we misinterpreted the mood of their screams.)

We did have to circle back around, but on a parallel street, since everything is one-way there. As we passed the intersection from the upper street, I looked down and saw that the cops had blocked the entire area off by then and a sizeable group of onlookers had gathered. I had texted immediately to tell him to find out what was happening, if this lady was attacked, mugged, murdered and dumped, etc. We were all totally fixated and unable to let go.

We drove in silence for a few seconds, and, realizing that Men I Trust was still warbling on in the background, I said, “Well, now it’s the vibe for this music.” And we all laughed drily.

Then Chooch said that one of his friends from Drexel had been to Pgh once and went to Randyland which is on the same street and joked to Chooch to “be careful, that’s a bad area.” And then, surprise, maybe-dead body outside of the Mattress Factory. :/

Meanwhile, Henry was at home checking the police scanner. He was able to find out that the woman had been transported to AGH, a hospital that is luckily EXTREMELY close, as in right down the street, from where the woman was found so that was one silver lining. He said that probably if she was taken to the hospital, she was still alive when they found her.

“Could she have just fallen?” Corey asked, seconding what Henry was also suggesting via text. But you guys, you didn’t see her. This didn’t look like someone who had just stumbled on the sidewalk and hit her head. Especially because of where the blood was, facing up. Unless she fell and rolled over but still, the blood. There was so much.

“Head wounds bleed a lot,” Henry said later that day when I was back home and spiraling out, but I cut him off because JESUS CHRIST IS THERE ANY SUBJECT SAFE FROM HIS MANSPLAINING?!

When I say that this completely took over my life for over a week, yikes.  I haven’t even been able to bring myself to finally write about it until now. I spent ALL WEEKEND googling, looking on Pgh Reddit sub-threads, battling the shitty local news websites, seeing that lady’s glassy eyes every time I blinked. I had a very hard falling asleep that weekend.

The next day, I wanted to get coffee at Yinz Coffee on the way home from lunch and record shopping with Henry and Chooch. The Yinz Coffee location that was closest to us is actually right around the corner from the SCENE. First, I tried to get Henry to go into the hospital and inquire about her status, just said he was a concerned citizen and just wanted to know if she was alive. He very vehemently opposed this idea and said that he didn’t want to be put on a suspect list which made me say, “SO YOU AGREE THAT THIS WAS A VIOLENT CRIME AND NOT AN ACCIDENT!”

Then I made him drive past the SCENE once coffee was procured, because maybe there were clues there, a killer lurking behind a lamppost, memorial flowers left at the spot, I DO NOT KNOW WHAT I WAS EXPECTING TO SEE but it was just a regular slab of sidewalk. Nothing unusual.

I had my weekly therapy session on Tuesday and she was like HOW WAS YOUR WEEKEND because I had told her the week before that we had plans and we had chatted about the Mattress Factory so watching her face change as I said, “IT WAS GOOD BUT THEN….” Well, it was something to behold.

We ended up spending half the session talking about this, trying to rationalize it, best-case-scenario it, make it less sinister in my mind. “Maybe picture her surrounded by a white light?” she suggested but when I conjured that image up in my mind, all it did was serve to spotlight the BLOOD AND THOSE EYES.

Saturday night, when Henry and I were driving home from Philly, I blurted out entirely apropos of nothing, “But if she just FELL or something innocent, why did so many cops arrive on the scene?”

Henry looked at me blankly. To be fair, I had been quietly dwelling on this in my corner of the car and brought him into mid-stream of conscious so he had no idea what I was talking about, also because he hasn’t been thinking about it constantly like I have.

On Sunday, we went out with Amy & Dick and I was clamoring to talk about this with someone. That’s just my nature – something happens and I have to rehash it over and over with every new audience put in front of me. So, I’m telling them this story and Henry interrupts.

“Actually, I do know what happened,” he said calmly, in the same manner used for advising your table mates that you know what you want to order for lunch.

I turned on him instantly. “WTF??? Since when?” I cried.

“Since last night. I went back and listened to the calls that came in over the police scanner before the one I originally heard,” he said.

“YOU KNEW SINCE LAST NIGHT?” I screamed. “IT IS NOW—” (checks time on FitBit) “—2:30pm on Sunday! YOU WERE WITH ME ALL DAY AND DIDN’T THINK TO SAY ANYTHING?”

“I forgot,” he calmly shrugged.

Anyway, as I expected, it was not something innocent like she tripped and fell. Oh but she did fall, alright – WHEN SHE FUCKING JUMPED OUT A SECOND STORY WINDOW OR THE ROOF, THEY ARE NOT SURE.

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck – this had to have JUST HAPPENED before we walked out of the Mattress Factory. If I had fucking seen that.

If I had watched a person fall out of a building onto a sidewalk.

IF I HEARD IT.

I would have to double-down on therapy.

No. Nope.

And apparently according to the scanner, when it was originally called in, it was picked up by the paramedics so Henry didn’t hear that call, just the one that was made to the cops because they got involved once someone said she had jumped, and I guess they originally thought she was DOA until the cops got there and realized she was still alive.  WHY  DID SHE JUMP? Was she in imminent danger? Is there a perp out there somewhere that got away?? I want to say that I hope she is alive but if she did this to herself intentionally I can’t imagine the pain she was already in, so I am on a loop of hypotheticals over here, freaking myself out.

And then I am still hyper-fixated on the box truck and the three men. Are they even relevant to the story? Was the box truck driver the one who saw it and called it in? Were the three men involved other than just trying to get the box truck to stop holding up traffic on this otherwise innocuous residential street? WERE THEY THE WITNESSES?

UGH. I’ll probably never get the answers and need to let it go.

February feels like a lifetime ago and I am looking at this list like, “I read these books?” To be fair, I had a lingering fever for like 2 weeks so who knows what was going on.

1. Society of Lies by Lauren Ling Brown

Dark academia and one that I actually liked. Dual timelines and POVs. As with all dark academia, it was very far-fetched but also, I didn’t go an Ivy with secret societies so who am I to say that disbelief must be suspended? Chooch has a frenemy from high school who goes to Princeton and I want him to ask her if she knows anything, lol.

Anyway, this follows two sisters – one is a Princeton alum, the other is a current student – and I admittedly kept getting the timelines crossed. The younger sister uncovers a scandal within the most secretest of all the secret societies and then ends up murdered.

  2. Darkly by Marisha Pessl

This was alright but there were a lot of times when it wasn’t holding my attention and just honestly made me want to go back and read The Westing Game instead. I am a firm believer that YA books can be enjoyed by all but this one missed the mark for me. I probably would have loved this as a kid though.

3. We Could Be Rats by Emily R. Austin

I’m going to be honest here, I gave this an alleged 4 star rating on Goodreads and cannot for the life remember a single word of this book. February was such a crazy month. But OMG this book cover tho.

4. How to End a Love Story by Yulin Kuang

OK this I do remember reading and I know that I disliked it immensely. Girl falls in love with the guy who accidentally vehicular manslaughtered her suicidal sister in high school. I felt no emotional connection to anyone in this book. Also, love story? Bitch where.

5. Same As It Ever Was by Claire Lombardo

OK, this one was weird. I very much high-key hated this book. The main character was insufferable (also I feel like I had no idea what she looked like either) and has some bizarre secret friendship with a woman who could be her mother and I guess on some level I get that aspect because I have constantly befriended surrogate mom-types through my whole adult life since I don’t really have a mom who acts like a mom.

But this book just went on and on for a million pages and I was so disgusted at every turn. And then the very last several pages hit me like a freight train and I felt like I was done so dirty. 

Because this was able to touch a nerve and evoke emotions at the end, I gave it a 3.

6. The Trunk – Kim Ryeo-ryeon

One of the few Korean novels that I haven’t liked very much. I wanted to read this because it was adapted into a K-Drama with one of my favorite actors but after reading this book, I am really confused about how they were able to drag this out into a 16 episode series?? I haven’t watched it yet and now I don’t know if I will because legit nothing happened in this book. The main character works at this matchmaking company that has a secret marriage division so she’s basically a wife-for-hire for the wealthiest of the clients. You could imagine all the different directions this story could take but it was just like one long flat-line with no pay-off.

7. The Rom-Commers by Katherine Center

Mid.

8. Keep It in the Family by John Marrs

Mid x2. This was actually just ridiculous. I think my standards for thrillers have just gotten to be too high so this sounds like a me problem. I can admit that.

9. A Killing Cold by Kate Alice Marshall

This one was OK but I have read much better from this author and expected more. Rich family with dirty secrets, secluded and private family cabins in the winter, protagonist who can’t remember where she came from…it was decent but forgettable. Also, the “connection” between the main character and her fiancé was not believable to me.

10. Big in Sweden by Sally Franson

Beautiful and quirky cover! Narrated by Meg Ryan! Set in Sweden! Too bad none of those things were enough. I admittedly only picked this up because I was feeling nostalgic for Sweden but this didn’t scratch the itch. A trip  to Ikea would have been better. The main character is just insufferable and sorry Meg, but not even your voice could make me like her. Basically this broad wins a spot on some family tree reality show but it turns out to be like MTV/Road Rules the Challenge, but make it Swedish with the main point being that the Swedes love to watch the Americans cry.

And then the winner gets to connect with their Swedish family.

It was a miss for me, fam. Maybe if I had read this on a plane or something, it would have had a better effect on me, but a cold February at home in Pittsburgh somehow managed to provide the exact opposite of escapism.

the end.

OH MY FUCKING GOD. My G-Dragon lightstick and mini-keychain lightstick just arrived about an hour ago from Korea and I am so stoked! The sales of these items were so chaotic because it’s G-Dragon and everyone wanted it. The first round sold out within minutes but I managed to snag all three items without issue. G-Dragon’s company put out a statement promising to release more, and then that sale sold out immediately as well. I know it’s dumb but I feel so grateful that I was able to get these and can only pray that I can also get tickets to one of his upcoming US concerts so that I can use these IRL!

Being a Kpop stan is stressful. I got into this because my life was so depressing and full of sadness and while on the outside it seems like the Kpop life is so fun and happy, THERE IS THIS STUPID STRESSFUL UNDERBELLY OF FIGHTING WITH OTHER FANS / RESELLERS FOR CONCERT TICKETS AND MERCH. Lol.

But dude would you look at this light stick cradle?? G-DRAGON IS A FUCKING CREATIVE GENIUS. A functional and cute way to display your lightstick? GD’s got you. I love that this is something I would just already have in my house too, regardless of Kpop-association.

What a nice way to end a stupid work week.

I promise I won’t do this every year, but this is our FIRST anniversary as a married couple and I am feeling nice about that today and was in my feels looking through pictures from our Korean Marriage Mission.  So, here are some (the only, actually) pictures of me and Henry from that trip! Most of the pictures were of Chooch, or of all three of us. Not too many of just me and Henry together probably because he IS SO ANNOYING to take pictures with.

(Henry. Yes, you are.)

In Gyeongju!

Our handmade wedding bands that we made in Hongdae!

LOL us with our marriage license; Chooch was SO PUT OUT that we asked him to CROSS THE STREET and come over to us to take this picture. He gave literally zero fucks about this whole thing because his life did not change at all.

I loved loved loved this place. 

Buddhist Food in Insadong!

Cheonggyecheon <3

We actually came here to take Chooch’s senior pictures, but he snapped some of us too, grudgingly.

I love this picture so much, thanks Chooch! I should probably get this framed.

Henry’s dumb face lol.

One of the BEST places to walk and a great place to watch the sun set. 

I hope that we get to go back to Korea again someday. I feel more alive there than I have anywhere else in my life and the fact that Henry was willing to marry me there means so much more than any traditional wedding we could have had here. It was no frills. Just us, in jeans. I actually couldn’t imagine doing this any other way and would not change a thing.

(OK, maybe I’d have eaten more salt bread. Lol.)

Ugh, I’m crying as usual.

I woke up today to a gift bag full of Totally Erin gifts:

I was cracking up because these could easily pass for a middle schooler’s birthday presents.

Speaking of…Henry said that he talked to his mom today. She said something along the lines of how it’s too bad he didn’t meet me before “that other one” and married me first. Henry was like, “Mom, I’d have gone to jail.” I mean, considering I was IN MIDDLE SCHOOL when he was marrying “that other one.”

So, then she said that he could have “waited for me” and I screamed, “EW, SHE WAS SUGGESTING THAT YOU GROOM ME?!”

That was such a sobering moment on The First Anniversary of Ruby & Hoover’s Marriage Fit for an LJ Post.

Anyway, baby’s first Enhypen album!

Skipping Saturday’s action for now and going right to Sunday because there’s less to say and I am lazy. (A lot happened on Saturday!)

I really wanted to have a NICE FAMILY AFTERNOON. Chooch got really into collecting records several years ago so I thought it would be best to offset the misery of “hanging with the parents” by including the incentive of record shopping. He seemed to perk up at that.

I found this random Turkish cafe in Harmar which was on the way to the record shop we were going to in New Kensington. It was called Gino’s Petit something so super confusing because it sounded both Italian and French but then…Turkish. I loved the vibes of the place! It seemed to maybe be a family affair? There was some yelling going on in the kitchen. Our server was wearing a bright orange crop top and leather shorts. I don’t know that this has much to do with anything, but I wanted to remember that lol.

To start, I got Turkish coffee and it was d-i-v-i-n-e.

Crepes seemed to be the main draw there but Chooch and I had just had some of the best crepes in town the day before with Corey, so we both went for something different. Henry and Chooch both got omelettes and I got the TURKISH PLATTER which was like a fancy Lunchables that someone plated for me. The scrambled eggs were mid but I really enjoyed making one-bites out of the tomatoes, cucumbers, feta and mozzarella. And you know I love some olives, boy. They gave me more than what was advertised lol.

Plus, the inexplicable inclusion of french fries – this wasn’t featured in the description so I feel like they were an after thought, maybe some stragglers left in the fry basket or something.

But yo, listen. The best part, and I am closing my eyes in remembrance of the ecstasy my mouth experienced yesterday, was the SUBSTANTIAL SLICES OF MARBLED RYE TOAST which I straight up SOAKED in the provided honey and Turkish jam (it was pureed strawberries in a fruit syrup and I was ready to drink that shit, it was INTOXICATING). Henry and Chooch had to sit there for a full 10 minutes after finishing their meals while I ate each part of my plate. They were so annoyed at my exaggerated savoring of each component, haha.

I would like to go back sometime to try one of the sweet breakfast offerings after seeing plate after plate being shuttled past us to other tables.

Then we went to Preserving Vinyl in New Ken, where I was disgusted at how many Taylor Swift records there were, and the fact that there is vinyl pressed for Halsey of all the crap singers out there, what a waste of resources, if you ask me.

Anyway, I have been out of the record collecting loop for a big and was surprised to see so much Top 40 vinyl.

Then I just felt nostalgic when I saw all of the Joyce Manor, Citizen, etc AND THEN PVRIS STARTED PLAYING and Warped Tour Erin was like, “Knock knock, I’m still in here, you know.”

Chooch got a Daft Punk record (did not know he liked Daft Punk) and an Otis Redding collection.

Then we walked to the other location that’s in an old church which is also a music venue where Armor for Sleep was just playing and I wanted to go but it was the night after we came home from Chicago and Henry was being an Old. And I only know two other people who like(d) Armor For Sleep but:

1. Both live 4+ hours from me in each direction
2. I don’t talk to either of them anymore
3. lol

Anyway, at this place, Chooch got a super old Peter & the Wolf record which was cool just for the cover alone, and an Emerson Lake and Palmer record just because he liked the cover which was also coincidentally wolf-themed and I screamed, “I USED TO LOVE ELP YOU WILL PROBABLY LIKE THIS” and that was probably a mistake, I just swayed him in the opposite direction and am not preparing for him to be like, “So, I listened to that Emerson whatever record and actually it’s garbage.”

I really should have fucking bought this. I reference this movie once every two or three years and no one ever knows.

Then we left and I put on PVRIS for the drive home. What a wholesome afternoon with Chooch, Home from College.

Just a quick post to say that yesterday was our director’s retirement party and while it was so awesome to be in the office around so many old friends that I rarely see anymore. Wendy yelled at me at one point because apparently I was the designated photographer but no one told me, so I had to run around and try to capture everyone. I have this bad habit of diving in with no warning and snapping, so lots of pictures were taken of people mid-chew or looking like they’re arguing (maybe they were arguing).

Anyway, I will only post pictures of the people who know about my blog.

I had champagne and a seltzer in the middle of the afternoon at work, dopey-face activated.

There was beer there but Megan advised that it was BASIC BEER so I said HARD PASS.

Last month, we had a get-together at Steel Mill and I never posted about it because I got fucking sick for two weeks right after that and then it dropped off my list. But anyway! Similar to Chingumas, I made everyone would listen to me download the Party app so that I could use our shared pictures to create a photobook for Sue. I think it turned out cute!

I also made her a “Glenn” as a token of appreciation for letting me run amok all these years with my idiot ideas. I was calling it, in my head, the Stat(S)ue of Conflicts. She’s holding a Fig Bar because she used to always stock our snack table with them and then Todd and me would literally fight over the last one. And she always ended our dept meetings with “be kind.”

Lots and lots of conflicting (LOL) emotions with this one. Sue is the greatest boss I’ve ever had. She genuinely cares about everyone in our department and also let me get away with so many shenanigans (some of which were probably very annoying to her but if so, she never said it) like my non-sanctioned Easter egg hunt, all of the Glenn desecration, my fucking obnoxious desk-decor for Halloween (not to mention when I decorated other peoples’ desks and offices without their consent), THE ZINE, the G-Dragon Military Discharge Party that she had no idea was happening until she walked into the office that day and did a double take of the decor and food and just shook her head.

Sue and Barb were the ones I interviewed with 15 years ago (probably nearly to the day, considering I started working there on April 5th, 2010) and she would not have known this, but I was at one of the lowest points in my life then. We were struggling so bad financially, I couldn’t keep a steady job, I had recently lost my best friend (she didn’t die, she was just an asshole), and we were trying to raise a three-year-old as best as we could under these conditions. I had NO EXPERIENCE in this field. NONE. But she gave me a shot and over these years, she has seen potential in me and helped me have the confidence to use that.

Not to be dramatic and maudlin here, but she literally had a hand in turning my life around. Yeah, I know, I did that myself etc but she helped put me on that path.

Ugh, now that I have made myself depressed again, I need to go and do some jumping jacks or something because Kara and Janna are coming over to have pizza with us and interrogate Chooch on COLLEGE LIFE.

This post is going to be all over the place because I have been in a creative/chaotic frame of mind the last couple of days which hasn’t happened in a long time but I was inspired to come out of retirement and make something sort of art-y for a gift, so I am currently riding the adrenaline on that one. It’s a good feeling but also, sheesh, settle down, child.

I had a really nice weekend, I’m so happy to say! Henry and I spent a lot of time talking about G-Dragon, speculating when he will come to the US on his tour (rumor has it – September), if BIGBANG will officially reunite, etc. This is nothing new, everyone knows Henry is a freaking hero, etc., but I am so glad that we have this common interest and it’s not just me making his ears bleed with all of my incessant Jonny Craig gushing like back in the day. Whoever would have thought that it would be Korea of all things that came forth as the glue to keep us together? I love this so much, every time I think about it! Here’s Henry with his bias list and constant Instagram reel sending. SOMETIMES HE EVEN SCOOPS ME ON KOREAN NEWS!!

Anyway, that’s my little love note to Henry, feeling mushy because my phone calendar alerted me that our “Dumb Anniversary” is next week.

Well, here’s some things from the weekend that I’d like to remember, because who knows – maybe one day in the future life will be worse than it is now and I will look back on this season and scoff about how naive I was.

I love when “Abbott Elementary” has Drexel Easter eggs in it! This one particular episode even had scenes that were filmed in one of the buildings that we visited on Admitted Students day. It’s just exciting to me, OK?? I had literally never heard of Drexel before Chooch was like, “Oh yeah btw I got into Drexel” and I was like, “Huh? Where even is that??” I just…don’t know stuff about colleges, OK? I’m a high school drop out, after all.

Saturday was so nice. Henry and I went to Pink Box for some later afternoon snacks and then walked it off for an hour in Homewood Cem while literally (literally!!) spending the ENTIRE TIME ranting about that piece of shit Elon and his VP Trump. My friend Nate and I are going to protest at a Tesla dealership and I know Henry is nervous about this because I have been on this kick lately about wanting to get arrested at a protest.

Even Chooch was like, “That is the LAST place you need to be.”

EXACTLY!!

On Sunday, I met Lauren, Sandy, and Nate at The Abbey for brunch. It was SUCH A GOOD TIME. First of all, I somehow had not seen neither Sandy nor Nate since the last brunch I went to with them LAST MARCH.  How is that even possible?!?

Anyway, what a great fucking time, I’m not even kidding. I miss seeing these guys every day at work. And the best part is that we didn’t even really talk about work at all!

Our waiter this time as opposed to when I was there a few weeks ago was so wonderful and charming without being aggressive and there were times when I almost slipped and asked if he wanted to join us, lol. He vibed with us so well. And when Sandy asked for separate checks, he didn’t react in a way that came off as him pegging her as tacky, WHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED TO ME THE LAST TIME AND I FUCKING DWELLED ON IT FOR THE ENTIRE WEEKEND AND MAY HAVE EVEN TALKED ABOUT IT IN  THERAPY.

I dunno man, the stars were just well-aligned this time around.

My vegan pancakes – so good but I could only chip away at half of that biggun’ stack!

After brunch, we walked down the street to get some French delights from La Gourmandine to take home. It pains me to say this but I thought of someone other than myself for once and chose something specifically for Henry. Ugh. Some chocolate almond thing. I guess he deserved it because he was at home working on G-Dragon pins haha.

On my drive home (the Abbey has a parking lot now so I can drive there on my own without stressing about street parking which is 100% the reason I will usually make Henry drive me – I HATE driving around looking for a spot and then when I find one, I’m scared that my car will get sideswiped) it started POURING down rain. Like, torrentially. Then it stopped after I came home and I was on the front porch trying to get three of my Buddys to share walnuts when another storm came in out of nowhere (well, a meteorologist will likely have something to say about that) – this crazy-ass sideways rain, the street in front of my house began  to flood, and all the squirrels peaced out. Henry and I were watching this from the front door when suddenly there was a loud bang coming from the back of the house.

Oh, just a very substantial part of a tree breaking off and falling onto the roof of the backporch.

LOL ignore all the refuse back there. Our neighbors like to dump large trash items back there, like air conditioners, those pipe things, there’s also a Big Wheel type kids car that has been there for so long, I can’t believe it hasn’t sunk into the earth by now. But yeah, now this huge ass tree branch is in pieces on our porch roof, backyard, and driveway.

Oh well.

No damage was done to not-our house, so whatev.

Yeah, I really don’t think there was anything else to note. I was so drowsy the rest of the day, those fucking pancakes. This is why I usually always opt for savory breakfast fare but they were called ROSE WINDOW PANCAKES and came with nut butter, I’m such a sucker. They were so good but even Henry was like, “Jesus, this is a LOT of pancake” when I gave him my leftovers.

In non-weekend news: Chooch comes home for spring break tomorrow so hopefully I will have some blog fodder during his visit since my life is otherwise so empty these days lol.

We started to make our way over to the Allstate Arena around 6:30 so I could pass out my freebies to people in line. The arena has a plethora of hotels around it so usually when we go to a concert there it’s just a short walk across the street which is so convenient. Especially afterward when all you want to do is go lay down (maybe that’s just us elders) without the struggle of trying to fight your way out of the parking lot. We had to actually drive there from a hotel near the airport when we saw Seventeen because all the close hotels were sold out and I will tell you that it was very annoying.

I ended up having way more NCT freebies than I did for the Taemin concert and it took me so much longer to pass these out which quickly drained my social battery!

Here’s a small selection of what they looked like ^^^

It was fun though hearing people squeal when they saw which member they got! And the lady behind me in line traded me two Haechan pocas after I gave her a pin! She was there with her husband/boyfriend and I did notice that there were guys there than usual. It was funny because I would always tentatively hand a pin to the guys while asking, “Do you want one too?” and they ALWAYS said yes with a quickness except for one dad who was there with his daughter, lol.

I’m dying, imagining going to this kind of a concert with my dad back when I was a teenager.

It was one of the speediest concert entrances I’ve ever experienced since getting into Kpop. Doors opened on time and the lines moved efficiently. No hold ups whatsoever. We had a good hour to kill though once we got inside so we walked around, Henry got a beer, I tried to decide which shirt I wanted – all the merch lines were crazy long but Henry said he would get in line during one of the VCRs.

Anyway, this was the first time I noticed that Robert Smith is on this wall! He caught my eye when we were walking past and I had to circle back against foot traffic to get a picture.

Also, I needed a picture of Henry’s beer for Untappd. It was OK. I didn’t love it so much that I desired a full can for myself. A few sips of his was fine.

First, we went to find Henry’s seat and I was cracking up because he purposely bought a ticket for the very last row of the upper section and even lucked out with an aisle seat. I was all the way down below, three rows back from the floor to the left of the extended stage, similar to where I was for NCT Dream too – same section but I was first row for that one :(

Henry said he actually STOOD UP at some points! He NEVER stands at concerts but I guess there were some songs that he really wanted to see not just hear for NCT127. I’m shook.

This was my view, not too bad at all. I was surround by super unobtrusive and inoffensive NCTzens. I had no trouble seeing even when the rows in front of me filled up and everyone stood. No one was being an asshole. Levels of screaming were normal. Small talk was friendly. There was a single girl to my left and she loved my Haechan shirt and had me take picture of her before the show started. The girl to my right gave me this funny picture of Haechan:

Then the girl was RIGHT next to me was there with her mom and was also very chill. It was just a great experience overall, crowd-wise!

And then the concert started and let me just tell you, I guess enough time had passed between NCT127 concerts because I fucking forget how much they bring the noise for real. They MIGHT be the loudest groups I have ever seen, between the chaos of their music and choreo and the guttural roars of the crowd – there were legit times when I couldn’t tell what song was starting because the droning cacophony of the fans around me were drowning it out. It gets THAT loud for NCT127! I will never forget the first time Chooch and I saw them at KCON 2017 – it sounded like the roof of the Prudential Center was going to collapse from the intensity of the bass during Cherry Bomb. Chooch was just like, “GOOD LORD” and talked about it for days.

I almost didn’t get tickets for this show. Usually I’m waiting on Ticketmaster for the moment tickets go on sale but for NCT127, I tried to reason that I just saw them in 2022, it would mean going back to Chicago two weeks after seeing Taemin, and Taeyong and Jaehyun (my 127 bias!) are in the military.

But you know what, I realized that last bit was exactly WHY I needed to go, because between military enlistments and one member allegedly being a rapist (hasn’t been officially charged yet but it does seem pretty damning), the remaining members need our support. What kind of fair-weathered NCTzen would I be if I skipped this?

Plus, it is very hard for me to rationalize passing the opportunity to see my ult NCT bias, Haechan. I just REALLY adore him!! His voice is so unique and I love watching him dance.

You don’t care but: Johnny, Haechan, Mark, Yuta, Jungwoo, Doyoung.

Previously, Henry’s bias was Yuta but after this concert, he has officially added MARK to the list of not just NCT127 biases, but TOP 5 BIASES ACROSS ALL GROUPS! He really put a lot of thought into it too:

1. G-Dragon
2. Mark
3. Yuta
4. Hoshi
5. Taemin

COMING OUT CASKET FRESH.

My favorite moments of the night were finally seeing Walk, the inclusion of a recording and video of Jaehyun during Lemonade and Touch, WHIPLASH!!!!!!!!!!, and the fucking powerhouse vocals during No Longer. I was screaming, literally – my throat was HURT.

And Chain!!!!

I am so glad that we went to the Chicago stop because it’s Johnny’s hometown and that just made it feel more special, like when we saw NCT Dream in Long Island and Mark had actually spent a good portion of his childhood living there.

I felt that the ending ments were very emotional, particularly Mark, Haechan, and Johnny. Haechan seemed to be alluding to the fact that he or maybe others might be performing with injuries or their bodies just not in the best condition, Mark seemed to be hard on himself and worried that his voice didn’t sound good, and Johnny – who is now 30 years old and I can’t accept this – was very sentimental and focused on time passing so quickly and the panic about remembering the important moments. It was….so relatable. The fact that this group was less than a year into their debut when I first saw them in 2017 – Jungwoo wasn’t even a member yet – and now two of them are in the military…it makes me feel old too.

Time is so scary. Mortality is depressing.

But, as long as I have music in my life, and concerts to look forward to, and comebacks adding fanatical excitement to my days, I will stay young at heart. People say they don’t understand this and I feel sorry for those people. It doesn’t have to be Kpop, it could be classic rock, it could be metal, it could be Broadway shows or sports or beer. As long as we have that one thing that inspires joy, who needs the validation of people who don’t understand it.

SETLIST

1. Gas
2. Faster
3. Bring the Noize
4. 2 Baddiess
5. Skyscraperr
6. Chain
7. Designerr
8. Orange Seoull
9. TOUCHH
10. No Cluee
11. Pricey
12. Regular (English version)
13. Sticker
14. Whiplash
15. Lemonade
16. Rain Drop
17. Can’t Help Myself
18. Gold Dust
19. No Longer
20. Far
21. Kick It
22. Fact Check

Encore:

1. Intro: Wall to Wall
2. Walk
3. Meaning of Love
4. Dreams Come True
5. Promise You

As always, I’m so grateful that I was able to go to this, that Henry is also a fan so that we could dish about it the entire drive home the next day, and that moments of happiness like this still exist in a world that is in flames.

I have nothing left to give today so Henry suggested, “Hey SWEETIE why don’t you let me do a guest post today? I could tell your imaginary friends about my five favorite songs that NCT127 performed last Friday since you have been too lazy to do your own concert review.”

In so many words.

I’ll try to include live performances where possible if I can find decent quality, whether it’s from the Chicago show or not, who cares.

So I guess he will dictate the rest of this post to me. Bye.

1. GAS

Why, Henry? “Because I like the song.”

God OK, Henry, calm down.

2. Bring the Noize

Why, Henry? “All of my reasons are going to be I like the song, I don’t know.”

Great. I also like this song so much but it was sad without Jaehyun (he’s in the military).

3. 2 Baddies

Do you have anything to add, Henry? “I just like the song. It’s better live.”

4. Regular

Anything to add about Regular? “Um, not really. No.”

5. Kick It & Walk (tied)

Kick It is Henry’s favorite NCT127 song of all time yet when we were at the DDP in Korea last year and they had the video for it playing on a huge screen with no audio, he DID NOT KNOW WHAT IT WAS. I was actually sickened. The choreo for Kick It is super distinguishable!?

I’m not asking him any more questions because his non-answers are pissing me off.

What an absolute waste of time, but there you have it – Henry’s top 5/6 favorite songs from last week’s NCT127 concert where apparently, he added Mark as his co-bias with Yuta??!? He just told me this the other night! I was like, “Wow OK, Mark coming in out of nowhere.”

We had a few hours to kill before the NCT127 concert so like true homebodies we went to a nearby beer store and got some IPAs to drink in our hotel room while eating HMart snacks and I walked back and forth forever to get steps after sitting in the car all day.

What extravagant lives we lead.

In all honesty though, I still get pre-concert gut gurgles even at this old and wizened age. You’d think I was the one going on stage.

If Henry is sitting with me, there’s much less anxiety but we typically DON’T sit anywhere near each other at Kpop concerts because I like to get the best seat as possible within reason and it’s just too much $$$ for us to get two tickets together. So, Henry will usually wait until the day-of and get the cheapest seat he can find which always puts him way in the back row of the upper level. He’s fine with that but I always have to get myself pumped up knowing that I’m going to be sitting alone and may need to make small talk with those around me.

This is part of the exorbitant price I pay to see my Kpop faves though. Worth it.

Anyway, we stayed at an Extended Stay near the Allstate Arena and it was OK. The room was outdated but clean. I hated the people in the room next to us who kept banging into the wall but Henry, in my interpretation of his non-action, was like YOU ARE OVERREACTING. OK, cool, whatever. I did feel guilty for a second because what if it was other NCTzens next door, but the thumping was still going strong when we came back that night too so I don’t think they were there for the concert.

Also, the fact that I am sitting here a week later, at 7:56am, typing furiously about a faint and sporadic thumping that bothered me really illustrates how neurotic and unreasonable I am.

Ugh. Moving on, here’s what I wore to NCT127: The Movement!

1. I am so happy that my Neobong has gotten so much use over the years! I know lightsticks can seem like a ridiculous splurge and my collection is growing to an embarrassing size, but it really is such a huge part of the concert culture! Shout out to my king, G-Dragon, for starting the trend.
2. I decided to go Haechan-biased this time. For NCT Dream, I lean toward Renjun, but Haechan is my overall bias across the whole NCT universe. I was so stoked to see him again that night! Twice in 2024 with Dream, and now this year with 127? Fuck yeah.
3. Also, this was the 4th NCT concert I got to wear my DIY NCT shoes to! And THE FIRST TIME someone complimented them, thank you for noticing, person in line to get into the arena!
4. Henry is getting better at taking pictures of me ever since I sent him a tutorial on Instagram where some young photographer was like, “Watch me teach my dad how to take photos of me.” I sent it to Henry and now he remembers to take the appropriate steps so that I don’t look like a mongoloid.
5. I wore my homemade Haechan pendant which is super outdated (look at baby Haechan!!) but I love it still. The other NCT necklace was made by my friend Danielle from The Idol Collective and it is the perfect neo-accessory.
6. The shirt features Haechan from the “Favorite” comeback special “The Vampire House” and this one of my favorite comeback cycles.

I’m sure I have posted so many versions of this in the past but this is one of my top NCT songs ever and it reminds me of fall 2021 which was a really nice time in my life as opposed to now which feels like life is flipped on its head but that’s ok, we’ll get through it one Kpop concert at a time, haha.

When we went to Chicago (specifically the Rosemont area, which is near the airport, F-Y-to-the-I) for the NCT Dream concert in 2023, we ate an early dinner at this vegan Korean place called Amitabul and when I say I still dream of this place…from the peaceful “om”s wafting down from the speakers, to the amicable Korean owner, and most importantly THE FRESH VEGGIE-LADEN FOOD. I was excited to stop by again before the NCT127 concert on Friday.

Dude, there are so many things to choose from, but I really don’t think you can go wrong. I got this delectable noodle dish and joined the Clean Plate Club – maybe a bit too fast, though. We both inhaled our food and ended up so stuffed, but not in a sickeningly way because this food is so healthy!

The only downside to this place is that since there is no music playing – just the “om”ing, and it was between lunch and dinner so aside from lone diner in the back and several people come in for take-out, it is QUIET.

Which means only one thing…

Henry’s mastication is amplified.

I tried to get a video to send to Chooch, who was born with the same aural affliction as me (actually, his was dormant until he learned about this on an episode of How I Met Your Mother and now he’s even worse than me about it) but Henry refused to chew until I put my phone down.

Jesus Christ, though – when he went back to eating it sounded like he was cutting down a forest with his molars.

The downside of eating such a filling meal was that we had NO ROOM for samples when we went to HMart afterward :( We did grab some snacks and samgak kimbap for later though.

And some hodu-gwaja! These are little cake-like balls filled with red bean and walnuts and made me so nostalgic for Korea. I mean, I always am anyway, but I was transported back as soon as I opened the bag. They were good but not as good as the ones I bought from a stand in the subway station by our hotel last year. Ugh and I got to order them in Korean too! I feel dumb doing that in America.

The next morning, we got up way early for some reason and went to Lost Larson before making our way home. Lost Larson is a Swedish-inspired cafe that has been on my list since our coaster vacation and played an integral part in why our August trip to Chicago for ATEEZ was so terrible because we didn’t get in to town in enough time to make it there and then drove out of the way to my back-up cafe where I had a legit emotional breakdown afterward and actually considered going to a hospital but then was worried about the bill.

All of that to say, we made it there this time! It was….cold and underwhelming. The vibe was not vibing. The coffee (I had it black) was mid. The pastries did not make me feel like I was back in Sweden and, for being pre-8AM, tasted day old.

Not impressed even a little bit. I know this is an entirely different country (but the pastries in all of Scandinavia and Finland just really hit), but the pastry we got FROM A GAS STATION IN NORWAY was a billion times better than whatever stale shit they plated for us – with absolute ambivalence, might I add – at Lost Larson.

Hate to be this person twice in one blog post (“I was in <x country> and it was better there” – you know that person lol) but I feel like even if I had no basis of comparison, I would have left this place feeling completely unsatisfied.

Which we both were.

My search for comparable Swedish pastries continues.

Luckily, our last memory of this trip to Chicago was a good one because DARK MATTER was a few blocks away!

Yooooo. You guys. I first had Dark Matter coffee in 2014 at Riot Fest. They had a booth set up there and I am ALWAYS CRAVING COFFEE but whoever goes to a concert or music festival where coffee is actually available?! Man, I loved it from the very first sip. The next year, they were set up again and I told them, like an eager puppy, that I’m from Pgh and that their coffee was one of my favorite things about Riot Fest, so they gave me a free t-shirt!

Honestly, great coffee and great people. You can’t beat that.

Hi, I’m channeling my dad again. God, I am such an old dad!!

Anyway, would you believe that of all the times we have gone to Chicago, this was our first time actually going to one of their storefronts?! I have even ordered bags from them online but have never set foot in a brick-and-mortar location. Well, that all has been rectified because not only did I get a bussin’ cup of coffee to go, but I also stocked up on some bags for home and got a can of their super potent cold coffee. Henry a/k/a Mr. Dunkin’ got nothing because he was a’scared. Poor little coffee poser.

As expected, the people working there were super chill and didn’t make me feel like I was wasting their time which, I’m sorry, you know that happens at some cafes!

My coffee was actually free since I bought two bags so that made me even happier. And then when I got back to the car and took my first sip, I basically screamed in caffeinated ecstasy, “IT TASTES LIKE RIOT FEST!”

I can’t explain it, but it brought back the stench of the muddy field, the joy-inducing blue sky, and the perfectly cozy chill in the air, and the clashing cacophony of multiple bands playing simultaneously on various stages. Ugh, Riot Fest used to be such a good time.

After that, we made our way out of town and started our drive home. Henry stopped at the very first rest area and got himself a big ol’ cup of sugary cold brew at Dunkin’ and was so smug about it too.

The moment the lights went out in the Chicago Theater, I knew I was cooked. Done for. Stick a fork in me, sir.

(Blog Post Interlude: Henry, being the respectful Kpop Dad that he is, was standing at first and then realized that the girl behind him was v. smol, so he apologized and remained seated for the whole concert. Sure, call him courteous, praise his nunchi, but I believe this was his excuse to sit and drink his beer while admiring Taemin’s abs in comfort.)

Taemin opened with Deja Vu and my heart was palpitating at dangerous levels. Taemin.

LEE TAEMIN.

!!!!

UNDER THE SAME ROOF AS ME!

This is from the Bangkok stop because I couldn’t find any good quality videos from Chicago, but this is a classic example of going from “liking a song” to “FUCKING OBSESSING OVER A SONG” after seeing it performed live. It expanded its real estate in my heart.

I have been struggling with how to effectively encapsulate the swirling feelings of this night into a blog post, but if you have ever seen one of your God Tier artists, you know how it is. It’s impossible. You just have to know that I was hyper-aware of the riotous thumping of my heart the whole entire night. The mask may have been stifling my maniacal screaming, but I was IN DEEP. I could not take my eyes off of him (except for when the broad in front of me would start to lean out of the aisle, forcing me to have to move into the aisle too – she was pissing me off so much because she HAD SO MUCH ROOM between her and the girl to her right and if she would have just fucking stood within the area of her actual seat, I would have had the perfect view that I paid for BUT WHATEVER. That was the only less than perfect part of the whole night.)

I just want to post ever live video from the concert that I can find but that would be ridiculous so I will just keep watching those on my own time and tell you that this one of the best nights of my life. Taemin is art in motion. I know he is not a machine but D A N G, I wish he would have performed for another 2 hours. It felt so short.

Set 1:

• • Intro video
• Deja Vu
• Guilty
• Advice
  • Ment 1
• Goodbye
• IDEA
• Heaven

Set 2: Ballads

• • VCR (Henry went and bought my shirt during this!)
• I’m Crying
• Clockwork (!!!!!!!!!! I never thought I would hear this live!!!!)
• Not Over You
  • Ment 2 (with snippets of a cappella fan-requested songs, including LOVE!!!!, Flame of Love, Pretty Boy – he gave Kai a shout out here, welcoming him back from the military!)
• The Unknown Sea
• Blue

Set 3:

• • VCR
  • Dance break with dancer intros (I thought this was so cool of him to give them props!)
• G.O.A.T.
• The Rizzness (!!!)
• Sexy In the Air
  • Ment 4
• Move (!!!!! LEGENDARY)
• Want
• Criminal (I died)
• Horizon

Fan-led Singalong organized by ChiWols – The Unknown Sea

ENCORE:

• Danger
• Crush
  • Ment 5
• Hypnosis
  • Ment 6
• Say Less

I started crying as I typed that last song, haha.

These pictures are trash because they’re basically just screenshots from my videos but I don’t care.

View this post on Instagram

I go to concerts fairly often but this was the first time in quite some time when I actually had friends texting me the next day, and messaging me when I got back to work, asking me how it was because they knew what a major deal this was for me, and that made it even more special.

View this post on Instagram

OH LORD HELP ME.

I was texting Chooch like a maniac during the VCRs and when we got back to the hotel.

“Yeah, but did he even glance* at you?” he asked because he is such a little bastard lol.

*(I tried so hard to get VIP for the opportunity to “make eye contact” with Taemin, literally that was how one of the perks was described, and Chooch thought it was the funniest thing ever that 1. I was willing to pay $250 for this perk and that 2. VIP packages sold out in seconds.)

Songs I would have given up my blood to hear live:

• Love (he did sing a verse!)
• Rise
• Nemo
• Press Your Number
• Artistic Groove

But honestly, he could have sung nursery rhymes to us all night and I would have been happy.

And then the lights came on. I did not want to leave. :(

All I remember after this was walking back to the hotel in a daze, then being body-slammed by adrenaline and unable to fall asleep. I just lay there in bed, watching the video snippets I took on my phone, “Friends” playing on the hotel TV as is hotel tradition for us, feeling this insane mix of euphoria and a deep aching, which of course would grow legs by the next day and turn into full-fledged post-show depression.

On the drive home (which was actually pleasant, no fighting!) I just kept whispering, “I can’t believe we saw Taemin. He is so perfect. DID YOU SEE HOW PERFECT HE IS??”

My favorite part about him is his divine duality – when he is performing, he is this dark, sultry angel telling a story with every move he makes. right down to the intentional flexing of his fingers. No move is wasted, even the slightest twitch of his elbow matters. But then the music stops and he is LEE TAEMIN-AH, exuding precious innocence, being a dork, mocking us and himself – I can’t stand him, lol!

Ugh, it was so good. Taemin is a living legend and if you don’t know him by now, why?!

Our hotel (StayPineapple!) was a block away from The Chicago Theater and I kept looking out the window to see if people were lining up yet. There was a scary moment around 5PM when a bunch of firetrucks rolled up with their sirens on and parked directly across from the theater. I was like, “I SWEAR TO GOD, IF TAEMIN IS IN A BURNING BUILDING…..” but then they went into the building across from the theater. I don’t know what was happening but there didn’t appear to be a fire anywhere and hopefully it was nothing serious.

Yo, I was sooo paranoid and superstitious about this concert. Like, Lord just let me see Taemin tonight, Amen.

We left the hotel around 6 – doors were supposed to open at 6:30 and I wanted to have some time to pass out my freebies to my fellow Taemates. Dude, that took all of 10 minutes. My pins were gobbled up so quickly! It was fun getting to have some interactions with people in line and trading freebies with other people who also brought stuff – I got some fun bracelets :) And Henry, my placeholder in line, was also accumulating some swag for me too, what a dork lol.

I just want to say that this theater’s staff and security were so efficient with getting us inside quickly and safely. They had a side entrance opened as well so we were herded into that line, which then split into more lines for the security check points. Isn’t it sad that this is the world we live in, where we have to be searched before entering a theater? I’ve been thinking about that a lot lately, especially after seeing Ollie Wride at the Crafthouse where we walked right in and I can’t remember the last time I went to a concert where we could just “walk right in.”

Anyway though, it’s usually pretty quick with kpop concerts because these people know what not to have on their person but of course we managed to pick the ONE LINE that had the slug-slow security agent sifting through every item in every bag. Meanwhile, I WAS SO SICK TO MY STOMACH WITH PRE-TAEMIN JITTERS. I was so ready to see him / no, I’m not ready / OMG I can’t wait to see him / no, this isn’t real, I’m going to puke.

And so on and so forth, the internal angst went.

Once we were inside, it was mayhem. First order of business was merch procuring. This theater was not made for Kpop, lol. The merch line wrapped all the way down the first floor and up the steps to the balcony level, so Henry said he’d take one of the team and go back out to snag me a shirt during one of the VCRs — that’s the part of the concert where the artist/group leaves the stage to do a wardrobe change and pre-recorded videos play. To this day, the ones at the Winner concert in 2019 were the best because they were hilarious skits.

Our seats were OK. I can’t complain because I was able to get in as soon as they went on sale, managed to buy two before it sold out / went to premium prices. I want to say it was around $150 a seat, and almost immediately after that, all of the seats around our that were still available were triple that price. Fucking Ticketmaster. This whole tour was such a ticketing cluster. So many people missed out because they couldn’t afford the resale prices which of course dropped significantly days before the show (for the LA one at least, so I hear) but when so many people have to travel for Kpop concerts, it was gut-wrenching to see the disappointment in fans who just couldn’t viably drop everything and make that trip with less than a week’s notice.

I really fucking hate you, Ticketmaster.

Henry immediately left his seat to go to the bathroom and told me later that when he went to get my shirt, he wanted to use the bathroom again but the staff apparently realized that there were way more women there than men so they closed the mens rooms on the first floor and Henry had to go all the way upstairs to find an open one, lol. Anyway, he came back with this beer and it was pretty good! I was excited to post it on Untappd, haha.

He also got POPCORN for some idiotic reason (YOU DON’T EAT POPCORN AT A TAEMIN CONCERT HENRY) and this is him masticating his moustache into a twist while I attempted to take our picture. Ugh. Also, I wore a mask through the whole concert because I was on the tail end of a nearly two week illness and didn’t want to infect any fellow Taemin fans. I was also concerned for Taemin’s health too because I kept hearing about how many different flus and viruses were going around at the time, how it was the worst flu season we’ve had in decades, and all I kept thinking about was how now Taemin was here in the land of anti-vaxxers and mask-haters, and he was doing some VIP group pictures with fans. I really hope he was able to stay healthy and uninfected while he was here in fucking Dumberica.

This theater was so beautiful! And matched Taemin’s majestic aura.

The fans were a wide range of ages and ethnicities, and I will say that there were more men there than I have seen at most Kpop concerts. (Most of them were there with female counterparts but most of them seemed to also be fans, like Henry!)

Since doors opened earlier than 6:30, we ended up having to sit there for an hour waiting, and I will tell you that it was fucking FREEZING in that theater. Plus, I was wearing a thin blouse that billowed and fanned me every time someone walked by. And my legs wouldn’t stop shaking because of N E R V E S so Henry kept putting his hand on my knee to make me stop but I was sincerely about to catapult myself right out of my seat and through the ceiling, into the midwestern sky. It was really like that, I’m not exaggerating. The anticipation, the constant checking my phone for the time, trying to distract myself by texting Chooch who of course was just like “mm cool,” being annoyed by Captain Popcorn. It was all too much.

But then, finally, 7:30PM came and the lights went out…

Every week I’m like yeah boi, Friday Five, let’s get it. And then I quickly realize that I do not have five things to talk about. I am going to realllly try hard today though because Henry just left to go to Joann since they’re all closing and he’s trying to stock up on his crafty girl supplies.

1. Onew (!!!) announced a US tour for this spring and I am so stoked about it because you know how much I love SHINee but also, Onew’s solo work is to die for. You know I must really love him because I named our car Jinki which is his non-stage name! Anyway, tickets go on sale next Friday but we’ll be en route to Chicago then and I really don’t want to eff around with Ticketmaster on my phone in the car. Then! I saw that there is a Citi presale on Thursday so I signed up for a Citi credit card just for this. The way Kpop has a death grip on my life, yo. Anyway, wish me luck. We’re hoping to get tickets for the Detroit show at the Filmore!
2. I found out yesterday that DIANE WARREN – songwriting legend – wrote “Drama” with G-Dragon and I am speechless. It made me fall down the Diane Warren rabbit hole last night though because I knew some of her song-writing credits but there were a ton of songs on her “top 10 charting” songs that I loved and had no idea she wrote. “SHE WROTE LOVE WILL LEAD YOU BACK!!!” I screamed to Henry last night, who responded with a group of question marks Double Dutching above his head. “UM, TAYLOR DAYNE??” I scoffed, and then immediately put on the video. “There’s only one Taylor I listen to and that is DAYNE,” I said smugly and considered posting that on Threads but was too tired to deal with Swifties coming for me. Then I just got really pissed because how did she peak so long ago and not go on to be one of the leading Divas of our time!? Also, when I dated Jeff, he mentioned several times that he thought I looked like her (??? I don’t but OK???). And also, a lion. Which, OK. I can see that because I do get angry quite often.

2.5. I am still obviously really riding this G-Dragon wave hard. I can’t tell you how good it feels to wake up every day with G-Dragon in my feed, making TV appearances, smiling, radiating charisma, BEING A FUCKING KING. Ugh, I am still just as obsessed as I was in 2016.

3. OK this is probably somewhat dark but I found the below picture the other night and started laughing (it’s not funny at all actually but also it really kind of is) because I am fairly certain this was from my dad’s birthday in May 1995, after he and I had one of our signature knockdown drag-out fights and he slammed me into the ground in the backyard and then later, my mom was like, “Carry your dad’s birthday cake to Pappap’s house.” UM OK? Are you stupid? Why would you ask me to do that?? Anyway, we had a path that went from our backyard, through the woods (literally) to my Pappap’s backyard so that we wouldn’t have to cut through our neighbors’ backyard to get there. While walking on that path with my brothers, barely holding the cake box, I go – and I remember this V I V I D L Y – “Ooops” as I accidentally-on-purpose dropped the cake onto the ground. LOL Classic Erin, as they’d say! Anyway, I BELIEVE this picture is THAT DAY after everyone sat around to eat the smashed cake and TO BE FAIR only one side of it got ruined as I recall. I showed Henry and got to retell the story that I know I have told him before but he’s almost 60 and doesn’t remember anything. I was cracking up and he just frowned. Also, what was I thinking with that hair color?!!

(WAIT DID I LOOK TAYLOR DAYNE ADJACENT IN THE MID-90s??? I guess I’d have to see a picture of her after she intentionally spite-drops her dad’s birthday cake.)

4. Peenlop Time!!

5. I bought myself this jacket from Unlogical Poem as a Valentine gift to myself (and then I spammed Henry with a link of something else I wanted from Lala which was very annoying to him but he got the hint) and I love it! I wore it to the Abbey last week for our ladies lunch and the early 20s hostess LOVED IT and I was like YEAH YOU DO.

 But these are things I have been allowing myself to do lately – splurge a bit on clothes. When we were coming home from Chicago last week, I was wearing this fuzzy coat I have from Delia*s that has flowers on it and kind of looks vintage? We were at a really crappy Speedway outside of Toledo (I felt like JACK GRIFFIN from AP Bio) and some lady called out, “I LOVE YOUR COAT!” as I was getting back into the car. I KNOW THAT’S RIGHT. I had to immediately text Chooc to tell him this because you all know how much he loves it when strangers love things about me:

Some lady outside of TOLEDO told me she liked my coat today. // In a Speedway parking lot. // You would have been mad. // Maybe someday you’ll have a daughter. // And when I die she’ll be like ‘I want all grandma’s coats and purses.” // And then they’ll all be in your house again.

I know this is an unexpected response, but Chooch said, “Wow” to all of that and then “no” to the last part.

Here’s the aforementioned Delia*s coat from last March!

Welp! That was 5, I did it. I squeezed it out. Let’s end with my new favorite G-Dragon song??